Acceptance
 Is The Way To Happiness

Lynne Namka, Ed. D. © 1997

Be willing to have it so. Acceptance of what has happened is the first step
to overcoming the consequence of misfortune.
William James

All issues, all disturbances, all conflicts can be handled by understanding what the problem is and accepting it, then changing it. As the saying goes, We are either part of the problem or part of the solution. When we are disturbed about something or someone, it is because we do not understand on a higher level but view it through our personality which is attached to our need to control things and see ourselves in a positive light.

If some facet of our life is unacceptable, and we have been up front in dealing with it to no avail, sometimes the only way through is to accept that this is so. We cannot find serenity when we are at war with someone or with ourselves. Nothing happens on this great green earth by mistake. Unless we accept our situation and learn from it, we cannot be happy. If we learn from it, then we need not beat ourselves up.

Nor do we need to beat up others with blame words. We need only concentrate on our part of the situation; what needs to be changed in our way of thinking and having done so, happiness will follow.

Ten Things to Say To Help You Let Go

  • I refuse to take this issue into my central nervous system.
  • I turn this over to forces greater than myself.
  • I not giving this issue free rent in my brain anymore.
  • I forgive myself for being angry and I let it go.
  • Oh, well..... Whatever!
  • This too will pass.
  • Holy Spirit, heal my mind. Give me forgiveness and a new way of looking at this.
  • I forgive myself in my part of this situation and learn so I need not do it again.
  • I surrender this to the great good Universe in which I am a part.
  • I accept this behavior in myself and I release it for my highest good.

Forgiveness: Letting Go of the Anger That Binds You

Forgiveness can never be imposed, willed or insisted upon by yourself or by any other...It can not be a should. Holding on to an ancient hurt manifests as a blockage of energy hidden in the body that plays itself out in the daily life.

As anger beliefs are not only of the head, but of the energies of the body, the issue must be fully experienced to change the beliefs. Resentment and revenge thoughts are sometimes hard to break, but we can continue to ask them to leave. We can continue to ask our mind to stretch so we can see things in a different way. As Mary Ann Ward said, "Nothing has more lives than an unforgiven sin or error we refuse to correct."

There are three areas of forgiveness: that of our brother or sister, God or ourself. Each comes in turn according to the timing of the life. We can become quiet inside and turn things over to our Higher Power. The urgings of the Higher Self come forth to perceive the old hurt in a new way, saying, "Look, look at this....There are greater gifts waiting for you here."

The Course in Miracles tells us, "The holiest spot in the world is when an ancient hatred turns into a new love."

Forgiveness is detachment from how we insist things must be. The act of release comes only when the energies of the issue have played themself through and there is surrender to the greater understanding of things.

Self forgiveness is sometimes the hardest. There must be a full understanding and acceptance of the murky darkness of our nature before release come. On some level there is an understanding of "Yes, I am this and I have choice as to how I deal with it." Forgiveness is accepting the unacceptable in ourselves and seeing it in a new light. It is to know that all that is within us is of human nature.

Forgiveness is to go past the hurt of the little self into the connection with the greater Self. To forgive is to surrender. Forgiveness is to say, "Thy will be done."

Resources:

The Mad Family Gets Their Mads Out: Fifty Things You Can Say and Do to Release Anger, by Lynne Namka, Talk, Trust & Feel Press, 1120 N. Buchanan Ave. Charleston, IL, 61920. $12.95 ppd.

How to Let Go of Your Mad Baggage, by Lynne Namka, Talk, Trust & Feel Press, 1120 N. Buchanan Ave. Charleston, IL, 61920. $12.95 ppd.

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