Star Trek Voyager Reviews Written by Someone Who Actually LIKES the Show! -- Alliances

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Gather 'round, you who have traveled far and wide to learn of the story of that day, the story of betrayal and lost dreams, the story of a brotherhood dead to its own soul, the story of a war that would not be stopped, a thirst for blood which would not be slaked, a story of...oh, you get the idea.

Actually, this is my review of the Star Trek Voyager episode, "Alliances," which is quite good (the episode -- I can't speak for the review). This work is intended expressly for the enjoyment of Voyager fans and maybe a few people who just can't wait for the next Mario Puzo book. The rest of you may go elsewhere for your fun and games.

How about Pig Decoy Carving?

No? It really is an art! Okay then...

PLOT
Maj Culluh comes to Janeway to ask a favor, and Janeway says, "Yes, you badly coifed dog, I will do this favor, but you must remember that you owe me this favor. Someday I will want a favor, and you -- What? You say the Godfather thing is getting old? All right, I'll wait for the wormhole.

The Kazon have attacked Voyager, and the ship beats off the Kazon only after their weapons, shields, engines, and Janeway's hair have suffered heavy damage. There are many casualties, including Crewman Bendare. The Doctor tries hard to save him, but there's too much damage. Janeway's hair, however, fixes right up!

[Has anyone else noticed that the Kiss of Death for character is that cortical stimulator? As soon as Doc slaps one on Bendare's forehead, we know he's a gonner.]

Chakotay reports the damage to Janeway in her ready room and then urges her to think about making some changes in her stiff Starfleet attitude. "Starfleet works well in the Alpha Quadrant," he says, "but out here maybe we should be thinking like the Maquis." Like the Maquis, they are on their own, outmatched by their predators. Janeway resists the whole idea, but notes that Chakotay has a point about their circumstances.

They hold a memorial service for Bendare, who once saved Torres' life once and helped out Chakotay in a fight with some Maquis who didn't like his sense of humor (Hey! At least they've seen his sense of humor). Chakotay keeps a stiff upper lip [What does that expression mean???] while he says that Bendare fought "the good fight" and some guy blows the memorial service whistle.

With Jonas at his shoulder, Hogan confronts Janeway and says she should turn over whatever technology the Kazon want to get passage through this section of space. Janeway tells him she'll destroy the ship before she'll let the Kazon get their dirty hands on it, and we can see that Hogan is more than a little surprised by her determination.

Alone with Janeway in the turbo-lift, Chakotay urges Janeway again to soften her stance against the Kazon, going so far as to suggest an alliance with a sect or two. This freaks Janeway out so much she goes to ask Tuvok his opinion. Tuvok surprises her further by agreeing with the possibilities of such an alliance. He even mentions Spock's radical decision to create an alliance between the Federation and the Klingon Empire. Perhaps Voyager could introduce a momentary stability to this section of space, one that lasts long enough, anyway, for Voyager to get out of the area.

In the conference room, Janeway informs the command crew that she's decided to pursue the possibility of an alliance with the Kazon. Kim, of course, objects, but she squashes him like a little bug. Neelix more helpfully suggests that he go to the planet Sobrus to look up an old friend with a Kazon connection. Kim jokingly suggests they give Seska a call, but Torres takes it seriously. Janeway decides to contact her, even though she looks incredibly unhappy about the whole thing.

Voyager gets Culluh and Seska on the viewscreen and they arrange a rendezvous. Janeway looks even more unhappy.

Neelix goes to a seedy bar on Sobrus complete with a dancing sexy alien chick (but at least she doesn't have three breasts). There, he finds his acquaintance, Tersa, who's playing a game of matchsticks. Their little talk, however, is interrupted when Neelix is arrested by some badly-coifed Kazon thugs.

Janeway meets with Culluh and Seska, and all three thump their chests until Culluh makes a silly demand that they exchange crews. It seems Culluh just can't resist the opportunity to sneer at the whole idea of women with power, and, looking like she's just had to French-kiss the class nerd, Janeway stands up and calls an end to the whole meeting. This was, she says, a bad idea.

Neelix gets tossed into a cave prison with a bunch of Trabe refugees. As you might remember, the Trabe once held the Kazon enslaved, but about a generation ago the Kazon rebelled. Now the Kazon pursue the Trabe and give them no rest. This particular group of Trabe is commanded by Mabus, whose ship was attacked five days ago by the local Kazon.

Voyager finds no trace of Neelix at the rendezvous site. With her expression sending little daggers at Chakotay, Janeway decides to wait two hours for him to show up.

Down in engineering, Hogan urges Torres to dodge Janeway's authority and contact Seska directly. Torres says Seska isn't the person they thought she was, and, when Hogan persists, snarls in Janeway's defense (yeah!) and tells Hogan he's got no justification to criticize Janeway. His biggest worry is checking the dilithium in the engines, while Janeway is trying to get them home.

Jonas' ears prick up.

Neelix throws in his lot with these Trabe prisoners. Soon, there's the sound of phaser fire. A ball-like grenade rolls to the foot of the Kazon guard. BOOM! The prisoners escape.

Janeway gets ready to head to Sobrus with weapons charged, but an armada of Kazon ships approaches. Ready for the Big Fight, Janeway hails the lead ship -- only to be confronted with a smug Neelix on the viewscreen. He introduces Mabus, and they decide to talk over dinner.

At dinner, Mabus describes the Trabe's past abuses of the Kazon. They used to keep them as slaves, though he himself didn't realize how bad things were. Now he feels ashamed, and the children of his people are completely innocent of the atrocities committed upon the Kazon. Now all the Trabe want is peace, and a little place to call their own. Janeway seems touched by all this and serves Mabus wine. Well, it's not pecan pie, but it's something!

Jonas secretly contacts the Kazon and speaks to Rettik. He wants to talk to Seska, but Rettik says Jonas must prove his worth first.

In the ready room, Neelix tells Tuvok, Chakotay and Janeway about how the Trabe used to be respected throughout the sector for their wealth and power. Chakotay says the Trabe do seem to have learned their lesson. Tuvok says an alliance with the Trabe wouldn't help their cause with the Kazon, but Janeway knows they have no Kazon friends. She says it's Starfleet policy to trust until proven otherwise, and she'd rather join with the Trabe than the Kazon.

The Doctor checks the Trabe out and gives their cute little Trabe kids some vitamin shots. Janeway tells Mabus of her alliance idea, and he instantly expands the scope of it to include a peace meeting with all the Kazon leaders. The idea of being a peacemaker tempts Janeway in a major way. Her eyes sparkle with the whole idea.

The engraved invitations go out, and Culluh and Seska bicker about his handling of Janeway's offer. Seska basically orders Culluh to go to the meeting and scope things out.

Right before the scheduled conference, a worried Neelix tells Janeway he's heard of a man arrested for sketching a drawing of the conference room. Someone is planning something. Tuvok and Janeway agree that they should watch out for whoever tries to leave the conference room first. Chakotay wants to back out of the whole thing, but Janeway orders him instead to keep a transporter lock on the away team. She leaves for the conference with Tuvok and Neelix, and it's clear from the look on Chakotay's face that he wonders what he's started.

In the conference room, Tersa brags about the decor to Neelix, who's worried about how this is all going to work out. Janeway, Tuvok and Mabus arrive, then Tersa introduces the Kazon leaders, who snarl at her.

They sit at Tersa's beloved triangular table and snarl some more. While Tuvok keeps careful watch for the first person who looks like they're going to cut out, Culluh makes it clear that he's not interested in any offer that comes from a WOMAN and a Trabe.

Mabus suggests a withdrawal into conference, and Janeway's wide eyes fix on him in suspicion. The table shakes, and Janeway calls out a warning to the Kazon leaders, who take cover. A Trabe shuttle appears out the window and starts firing. Janeway, Tuvok, Neelix, and Mabus are beamed out as Voyager fires on the shuttle and foils the assassination attempt. The Kazon leaders leave their cover, snarl, and return to their ships.

In the transporter room, Mabus is disappointed that Janeway has ruined this great "chance for peace" in the killing of the Kazon leaders. Suffering from a major case of the "You betrayed me, you bastard," Janeway orders Mabus off her ship. With something like relish, Tuvok pushes Mabus onto the transporter pad and they beam him off. Janeway has Paris get them the heck out of there.

In the conference room, Janeway gets reports from her crew which assure her that they can go for weeks without stopping. Perhaps they can put enough distance between themselves and the Kazon...

In the meantime, Janeway says (mostly to Chakotay) that out here in this hostile sector of space, with no friends to help them, their best allies are their Federation ideals. She won't be bending them again.