HUMOR
The Flaxseed Disaster
By Mary Frost
(From FIBER NEWS June 1997)
Hi all,
Ok, I did it! I made the linen seed dressing for my warp threads.
I learned *alot*.....
I put *1 cup* of seeds to a big pot of water. Not having any
instructions I was guessing here....Brought it to a boil and than
turned it off and strained the seeds....all going pretty well I
thought.........then.....
It thickened really fast.....
I mean *thickened* into this massive blob of(let's just say it
was like egg whites if you get my drift). It had this weird
looking part in it so I thought "ok I'll just strain it again,no
biggy"... hee heee....I put the strainer over a bowl on the stove
and started to pour the dressing in the strainer but....this huge
BLOB of slimmy stuff lept from the pan, overflowed the strainer
and SLITHERED down and away into my stove top,which doesn't open
because it's from the 1950's!!!!!!!!!
I started laughing so hard I can't see or talk to tell my husband
or my mom (who just arrived from Oregon) what my problem was.
I peek through the burner and can see "the blob" (which has now
covered most of the inside of my stove top) and I start to mop it
up with paper towels....NOT.... paper towels have no absorbing
effect.... I'm laughing again.
Then I called my husband, Jack, to come help and even he is
grossed out at the thick egg white appearance of the dressing. He
gets the shop vac deposits it at my feet and ...disappears!
I can't describe the sound the blob made as it was sucked up into
that vac without really grossing you all out. But alas it is now
a blob in the yard, having been plopped out onto the ground.
With the stove cleaned (somewhat) and after getting up off the
living room floor where I landed while laughing my heart out I
tackled what was left in the pan.
I added alot of water and tried to use a whisk, and ended up
mixing with my hand. Had to transfer the mixture to a bucket
because it was still so thick. Finally, I triumphed with the
right consistency!!!!
Put my linen warp chains in, soaked for a few minutes and than
hung them up to dry. This morning they are perfectly coated and
ready for warping!
Lesson #1 Always keep a sense of humor when trying something new.
Lesson #2 You probably only need 1/4 of seeds to 4 quarts of
water!
Lesson #3 Paper towels are absolutely *no* help in cleaning up
flaxseed warp dressing.
Lesson #4 Always mix with your hand, gross but easier to tell
when you have the right consistency.
Lesson #5 Always keep a shop vac handy.....
Have a great day and remember to always try new things even if
you've been told not to....
Fondly,
Mary Frost
wevrmary@svn.net
Bio:
This insanity,this glorious obsession is due to my wonderful mother
Marcella Castro Laughlin who taught me to weave *and* bought me my first
loom in 1984!As I know how to spin I choose to weave and dye. I'll weave
just about anything but a rug or a tapestry (love to look at them though).
I used to hate warping when I first started...now I love warping and
designing and after weaving enough to see that my design worked I'm ready
to move onto my next design (fickle?)
I love making handtowels and guest towels and adore working with linen. My
current work is very focused and I'm in the early stages of exploring the
Shuttle Craft Guild original Monographs.
(editors note: Mary originally wrote this story as a note to the
weaving mailing list. She kindly re-wrote the story to share with
you all...:-)))
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