HOW TO START
AN HA CHAPTER
Have you ever said, "If only there was an HA chapter near -- my recovery would go so much better!"? Or, perhaps you do not struggle with homosexuality yourself, but wish you knew some way to help struggling men and women find freedom in Christ.
We have good news for you! You need not sit by helplessly any longer! You can be used of God to start an HA chapter!
You may be saying, "Me? Start an HA chapter? Impossible! "With God nothing shall be impossible" (Luke 1:37) Thousands of people struggling with a wide variety of problems have started support groups. About 500,000 such groups "will be attended by some 15 million Americans this week." [Newsweek, (February 5, 1990), p. 50] "The best news, though, is that group members make measurable progress...if they stick with the meetings." [ibid., p. 53]
Most HA chapters were started by someone who struggled themselves! Starting an HA chapter is not like starting a church where you are expected to be the pastor. It is more like starting a small Bible study group where you act as facilitator and, in time, share the responsibilities with others.
Nor are you expected to be a counselor. Support groups are made up of ordinary people who help each other deal with problems that trouble them. No one is expected to have all the answers. Those who need counseling go to a professional in addition to attending their support group.
Dr. Joal Fischer says, "Remember to enjoy yourself as you organize the group. Many founders of self-help groups find the organizing experience itself to be supportive and healing." [Power Tools: Ways To Build a Self-Help Group. (Charlotte, NC: SupportWorks, 1992), p. 1] As Edward Madara, executive director of the New Jersey Self-Help Clearinghouse, put it, "A self-help group can be started by anyone with a bit of courage, a sense of commitment, and a good dose of caring." [ibid., p. 8] It's really as easy as one, two, three!
1. Order the materials you need.
The video, HA: The Path to Freedom, will help you explain the program to interested people who do not struggle and to encourage people who come to you looking for help. You should also order 100 copies of the HA Brochure to give to new members and share with people who you want to know about what you are doing. The HA workbook, Lord, Set Me Free!, gives you the material you need for the teaching time in your meeting and the Homosexuals Anonymous Policy and Advisory Manual gives you additional information on how to facilitate a chapter. All these items are on page 1, column 1 of the enclosed HA Book Ministry list from which they can be ordered.
Notice the audio tapes listed under each step on the HA Book Ministry list. You will find it helpful to begin buying these as you are able. Listen to them yourself and loan them to those who come seeking help. Each contains four 15-20 minute messages on the step and can also be used, if you wish, for the teaching time in your meeting.
We encourage you to attend the first possible HA Training Seminar and to encourage those in your chapter with leadership potential to attend with you. It will make a tremendous difference!
You now have all the materials you need to start your meeting. What's next?
2. Set up the mechanisms for your chapter.
You will need a telephone with voice mail or an answering machine so people can contact you for information about your chapter. You may (1) use your own phone number (but this will only work if you do not mind other people who call you hearing a message about your chapter); (2) get a second phone line with an unlisted number in your name; or (3) get a listed phone with no address given under the name Homosexuals Anonymous. The last option is usually the most expensive but makes it easy for people seeking help to find you and allows you to be listed in the "Guide To Human Services" section of the phone book, usually through the United Way.
Put something like this message on your answering machine or voice mail: "Thank you for calling Homosexuals Anonymous, a fellowship of men and women seeking freedom from homosexuality. We cannot answer the phone now, but please leave your first name and phone number at the sound of the tone and we will get back to you. If you have an answering machine and wish us to leave you a message, please tell us. Otherwise we will keep trying to reach you in person. We will be discreet and your confidentiality will be respected. If you cannot leave your name and number, someone will be here to speak to you in person on (day) between (time) and (time). God bless you in your struggles."
As soon as you have your chapter's phone number, call HAFS (1-610-376-1146) and give it to us so we can put it in the Newsletter, give it to our 800 number who will give it to folk who call them from your area, and put it on our webpage. In this way people will be informed about the chapter you are starting.
While you have to bear the initial cost of the phone line and materials, keep receipts so you can be reimbursed from your chapter's offerings when the group starts meeting.
Your pastor or a sympathetic friend may be able to help you find a meeting place. If you don't know of a possible place now, contact local churches, Christian counselors, Christian physicians, hospitals, YMCA's and YWCA's, or your library as possibilities. Where do Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, Sexaholics Anonymous, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous, Al-Anon, or Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOL) meet in your area? These places may be open to you also.
Did you notice that we suggested you get a phone number and tell us about it before you find a meeting place? The reason for that is someone in your area seeking help may know of a facility which would be open to you. You can meet those who call before you find a meeting place at some place like a restaurant where you could share together and encourage each other.
When you have found a suitable place, determine the rent (if any) and set a time and date for your first formal meeting.
You've completed step two, the most difficult of the three steps to start a chapter. On to step three!
3. Hold your first meeting.
Follow the format explained in the section of the Homosexuals Anonymous Policy and Advisory Manual entitled "HA Meeting Format." Give an HA brochure to all who attend and urge them to commit themselves to attend for six weeks without missing so they can get to know the program and people and make an intelligent decision as to whether or not the group might be helpful to them. If they want a copy of the HA workbook, show them how to order it from the HA Book Ministry list. Otherwise, ask them to bring a Bible so they can participate. Tell them about the HA News and provide a sheet for the names and addresses of those who wish to receive it. Explain that everything mailed from HAFS never mentions Homosexuals Anonymous or homosexuality on the outside so they will never be embarrassed. Send the names and addresses of those who wish to receive the newsletter to us.
Don't expect to be overwhelmed by large numbers of people seeking help. That rarely happens with any anonymous group. Burt Schneider began a meeting for heterosexual sex addicts. "For the first year, I often sat alone in a church meeting room waiting for another person to show up. Many came and went, but eventually one other person stayed and the meeting grew." [Jennifer and Burt Schneider, Sex, Lies and Forgiveness: Couples Speaking Out On Healing From Sex Addiction, (New York: HarperCollins Publishers, 1990), p. 2-3]
Note also that you should not expect everyone to keep coming. Every anonymous group has its dropouts. "...AA's own surveys suggest that about half of those who come to the program are gone within three months." ["Does Therapy Help?", Consumer Reports, (November 1995), p. 738] Don't hold yourself responsible for anyone else's decision. Do keep at it! The Bible says, "And let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not" (Galatians 6:9). Be patient! You can expect more people and better meetings as the group matures.
Please remember, you are not alone in this undertaking unless you choose to be! H.A.F.S. is here to help you at every step of the way. Stay in close touch with us. Let us know how you are doing as well as how the group is progressing. Share questions, problems, ideas, and testimonies. Let us help each other to find ever increasing freedom in Christ!
-- John J., Reading, PA
HAFS Approved Literature, ©2000