The Day After Series I
I Call You by Name
By: Jenn Nistor

Disclaimer: The character Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, And Margaret Scully are the property of Chris Carter, Fox, and 1013 productions. They have been used with out permission, no copy right infringement is intended.

Notes: WOW! I'm really writing up a storm around here. This is a new story in my "Maybe Tomorrow" series. Actually this is a new series following after it known as..."The Day After". But to make those of you feel better, you can call it Maybe Tomorrow VIII. If you haven't read the previous stories then turn back now because you'll be confused and for those of you writing me and asking my why I killed Scully, did you read the story? If you read the end you would see that I didn't kill her, she was talking to Mulder at the end. Also this is just a good friendshipper story. It refers to the old romance they had, but at this point in the series they are just friends again. I think there may be around three of four more stories and by the end they will be back together. Anyway, on to the story......

Summery: It's Christmas and the Scully's have plenty to be thankful for, but does Mulder? As he tries to hold on to everything, he finds that there are just things not worth holding onto.

Dedication: After everything people go through there is always one thing that keeps them together and that's friendship. This is dedicated to Tracy, a fellow x-phile, whom I pray has enough strength to continue fighting the illness that plagues her.

The Day After: I "I Call You By Name"
a.k.a. Maybe Tomorrow VIII (Classification S,A)
By Jenn Nistor (Jenn1013X@aol.com)

The Air Somewhere
7:18 P.M.
December 23, 2000

Mulder could just make out the thin line of snow blowing near the engine outside his window. He was sick of snow. It seemed like it was snowing earlier and earlier every year. Leaning back in his seat he noticed his partner watching him. "What?" he asked.

She shrugged, "Nothing." Scully replied. "I just wanted to make sure that you hadn't changed your mind about Christmas. Mom wants you to comes over, she's even offered you a room for the night. Why won't you take it?"

Mulder shook his head. It really hadn't been all that long ago that Scully had been on her death bed after taking five rounds in the chest. He hadn't thought she was going to make it. The doctors had all given up, but he hadn't. He'd been shocked when she had opened her eyes and looked at him. Even now he was still shocked that she had survived. After all, it had only been a little over a month since the incident and they were just now coming back from the hospital.

It had been a long hard road, but she had recovered. He hadn't wanted to leave her there, but after days of arguing he had. Only that hadn't stopped him. Weekends and holidays were his only escape to her. He could still tell by the way she moved that she was in a lot of pain, but her depression had suddenly cleared leaving a huge sense of relief in his gut.

"I don't think that I should. I'd be imposing and I really don't want to impose." he tried to smile. "I think I'll just stick around my place and catch up on a little work.

Scully reached out and gently touched his leg. "Mom wants you to come. She hasn't properly thanked you for making all of those trips up to Boston to stay with me."

"I....I..." he stared down at her hand and prayed that she didn't see the way her touch effected him. While she had been recovering they had talked about a relationship and they both agreed that they weren't ready for anything serious. They or more like she, had agreed on friends and partners, not lovers.

Pushing his thoughts aside he focused back on her. "I don't think so Scully. We should probably. . ." he quickly shut his mouth when he saw the pain in her eyes. There was no way he was going to do this to her. She had been so happy, why depress her?

Reaching out he gently stroked her cheek. "Okay, you can call your mom and tell her that there is one more for dinner, tomorrow."

Scully grinned. "I think I know what buttons to push."

"Scully, that's not funny." he was suddenly very angry. She knew how much he hated it when she got like that. He stood up. "I'm going to switch seats."

"Mulder!" she cried. "Why can't you stop being so stubborn. Maybe you should give into my whims a few times. They won't kill you. I go on alien chase after alien chase with you and hardly ever complain. Can't you just come to my mothers with me." she paused. "I think that she got rid of all those *Spooky* ghosts."

Mulder laughed and quickly sat back down as the fasten seat belt light flashed on. "I'm not the stubborn one. You never know when to give up. can't you take 'NO' for an answer?"

"Fine, don't come over." Scully pushed her seat back and closed her eyes. "It's my mother you'll be dealing with, not me."

*******************
December 24, 2000
Scully's Residence
5:17 P.M.

"I'm worried about him, mom." Scully confessed as she peeled the carrots for the salad. "He's been sitting out there, in the snow for over an hour."

Margaret sighed, "Dana, haven't you ever wondered how he spends his holidays. From what I gathered he hasn't had many happy ones. This time of the year has to be the hardest on him."

"I know, I just wish he'd talk to me."

"If I recall, you never talked to him either, so why would he talk to you?" Margaret glanced out the window. "You two need to know how to communicate. Your always so professional. Always Mulder or Scully. Never Fox or Dana. It's almost like you never leave the office, so why should he talk to you about his personal problems?"

"I don't know." Scully muttered. "I just figured Mulder would want to talk about it."

"Dana?"

"Hmm?" she glanced up.

Margaret quickly wiped off her hands and sat down in the stood under the counter. "Why don't you ever call him by his first name? I don't think it'd kill you to try it."

Scully laughed. "He doesn't like it. I tried calling him Fox once and he practically bit my head off, so I've always called him Mulder. There was never much use in fighting with him. All it would get us was a suspension. Why would it really matter what I call him. I'm not calling him anything mean." she paused. "It's not like I call him Spooky."

"I was just curious as to why you didn't call him his given name. Fox is such a nice name, it had to have some significance to his parents or they wouldn't have named him that. What do you think Dana?"

"I guess." she replied, focusing her attention on Mulder. "I don't think he ever told me why he was named Fox." she paused and grabbed her jacket off the chair. "This is getting to be a weird conversation, I think that I'm going to go talk to him."

With out giving her mother another thought, she quickly hurried out the door. She was afraid of to disturb him. It wasn't often that he looked so at peace, but then again it wasn't often that she actually had a chance to watch him.

"Do you ever notice how the things around you change from season to season, but you don't?" Mulder asked, breaking the silence.

Scully shivered. "We change Mulder. It's just hard to see the change in ourselves." she sat down next to him. "We have to look into each other to see the change."

He turned to face her. "You've changed, but I can't see myself."

"Well you've changed and I think you need to talk about it, you seem so depressed."

He laughed. "Scul...."

She held up her hand. "Forget the Scully. Try calling me Dana for once. I think that Mulder and Scully should sort of cease for now." she paused, trying to think of what to say. "We're friends and even when we were lovers I still felt like I only had a small part of you."

"Does anyone really have anything more than a piece of others?" he asked.

"I don't know, but I'd like to find out."

"There's nothing to find out Scully." he paused. "I used to think that I still had some connection to my sister, but I just realized that I don't. I used to be able to feel her with me, but it suddenly feels like she is gone. I can't feel her anymore."

Scully squeezed his hand gently. "Maybe it's time for you too let go of your search. It's been twenty seven years. Maybe she isn't coming back."

"But she's alive, Scully." Mulder pulled his hand free and jumped to his feet. "You don't understand. I used to feel like I had a piece of her growing inside of me, but now it's gone. All that's left is an empty space that can't be filled." tears stung his eyes, but he didn't care. If she wanted to know what was bothering him then so be it.

"She's out there Scully, and so is the truth that I want. I know that it's out there. It's close, it has to be." he faced her. "Haven't you ever wanted something so much that it suddenly became your life and then your death. I mean your cage? I'm in so deep and I can't get out, I don't want to go back. I feel like I'm at the bottom of the ocean and I can't swim back, I just want to go deeper until I find the answers. You must have wanted something that much."

She nodded, "Yes, but with each day I live I feel like I'm traveling one step out of the cave I dug myself into." she sighed. "I guess that after each time I face death I get little stronger. My will sort of mends and the tares disappear. I may not have what I want in my grasp, but it's there. I know it's there, and because of this knowledge I go further. I don't give into the beacons or whims. I let myself go deeper. Because the truth IS our there, and you just have to continue."

Mulder smiled. "I never thought I'd hear you talk about that. What's it like to believe in finding what your looking for?"

"Why don't you tell me. It's been the strength behind your beliefs that have kept me going all of this time." "I can't find the strength anymore." he admitted sadly. "I didn't even have the strength to believe that you'd make it." his eyes sought hers. "If I were to give up this search, I'd have nothing, but if I don't, I'm going to lose everything."

"Fox..." she smiled at the sound of his name. "How would you lose everything if you continued? I'll always be here, you'll always have me and my beliefs. I don't want you to give up, I want you to do what you believe in."

"If I do what I believe in I'd be giving up. There's nothing left Scully. Your going to have to continue the X-Files with out me."

"Fine." she stood up and quickly pushed past him. "This was stupid. We're partners, nothing more." she pushed open the door. "I was stupid to think that you'd talk to me as a friend. Have a nice Christmas Fox Mulder, maybe you should go out there and start digging yourself a hole now. If you want, I'll even throw the dirt over you."

**************
1 hour later

Margaret sat quietly at the empty dinner table, watching the clock. She had heard the fight earlier that night, but hadn't thought it would have that much effect. Mulder had refused to come in and stayed outside. Dana had gone to her room and she hadn't heard a peep from the room.

"So much for a family Christmas." she muttered and through her napkin angrily down on the table. Then with out thinking, she ran up the stair and pounded on her daughters door. "Dana!"

"Come in." came a weak reply.

Suddenly worried that the fight had done something far more serious to her daughter she pushed the door open and walked in. "Dana?" she asked.

Scully opened her eyes. "My chest hurts, I thought I'd just get some rest. I'm sorry that I ruined your dinner."

Margaret shook her head and sat down next to the bed. "You didn't ruin my dinner. I'm relieved that you were able to live and make it this Christmas. I can wrap everything in foil and we can have the left overs tomorrow."

"No." she sat up, but winced. "I'll come down, this isn't fair to you. You went out of your way to make a nice dinner and Mulder and I ruined it."

"You didn't ruin my dinner. You need to rest, Dana. I'll bring you a tray and then you can get some sleep. Mulder and I will do just fine on our own."

"Fine." she agreed, not in the mood to argue. All she wanted to do was sleep. The fight she and Mulder had was really beginning to bother her. He was more than just her partner, she hadn't meant what she said. It just seemed like something was there that she was missing. There was suddenly some sort of wall or tower built up around them.

Margaret gave her daughter a quick kiss then hurried back down the stairs. She was surprised to find Mulder sitting in front of the fire, but didn't say anything. Instead she walked past him and into the kitchen. "I was wondering when you'd come in from the cold." she said softly.

"Where is Scully?" he asked.

"*Dana*. . ." she corrected. "Wasn't feeling well and went to bed. I was just about to bring her up a tray."

"Is she all right?" Mulder asked full of concern. What if he had done something to seriously hurt her?

Margaret shrugged. "I don't know. I think that you both need to talk and stop all of this bickering. You two have been friends much too long to keep this up. One of these days you are going to get careless and get yourself killed or seriously injured like Dana." she pulled out a loaf of bread. "I'm sick of getting phone calls at three in the morning, telling me that one of you is in the hospital hooked up to life support." she pulled a plate down from the cupboard. "You two need to start protecting each other and acting like partners, not enemies. I'm ashamed at the way you two treat each other."

"I can't help it." Mulder cried. "She's so strong and I'm. . . ." he shook his head. "I'm not. There is nothing left for me."

"Fox, you were the one who carried the strength! Damn it! You have to believe in yourself again. Dana's accident wasn't your fault. She got careless, you couldn't have stopped it. Stop acting like you were the one who shot her."

"She's just not there anymore." he whispered. "I just can't feel her anymore. She's gone." tears streaked his face. "She's all gone."

"Who?" Margaret asked gently. "Your sister?"

He nodded. "She was my strength, but now she's gone."

"Fox. . ." Margaret moved from around the counter and hugged him fiercely. "Don't give up now. Let Dana help you find her. Go talk to her. Just talk. One of these days you are going to wish that you had, but it will be to late."

Mulder pulled back and starred down at the floor below him. "Maybe tomorrow."
"No! Now!" she handed him two plates of food. "Go upstairs and eat with her. Reconcile now before it's to late."

"I-- I don't understand. What do you mean?"

"Go!"

"What do you mean." Mulder repeated.

"Fox, go!" she pushed him towards the stairs. "Just go."

***************

Scully tried to push away the tears rising in her throat, but they were just too much. Letting go, sobs began to shake her body to the point where she could no longer breath. Gasping for breath, she stumbled out of bed and to the window. She wanted to see if Mulder was still outside, but it was obvious that he wasn't.

When she saw the empty seat, the tears began to fall harder and before she knew what was happening she was sitting on the floor, gasping for breath. She clutched at her chest, praying that the air would come, but none came.

"Scully!" the voice was distance and even through the on coming darkness she knew it was him.

"Mul--" she reached out to him. There was a loud clatter followed by a set of heavy footsteps.

He lifted her off the floor and carried her to the bed. "Just breath, take short slow breaths." he gently rubbed her back until the color began to return to her cheeks. He was relieved when after a minute she was finally breathing.

"Mulder I'm sor--."

He placed a finger over her lips. "Shh-- call me Fox. You can call me by name."

She smiled and touched his arm lightly. "Don't give up. Don't give up today or tomorrow or even the day after. It's not worth it. Giving up the search will only make *them* happy and I don't want them to be happy. I want you to be happy."

"I am happy Dana. Your my friend and with out you I'd be dead. You've kept me safe and protected me. You've cleared my name more times than I can count and you've always been honest with me even though I haven't been honest with you. Friends like you only come along once in a life time, and if my calling you Scully bothers you I want you to tell me."

Scully laughed. "Is that what started this argument?" she asked.

He nodded. "Unfortunately it is, but you're right. Fox and Dana are more personal and calling you Dana makes me feel like I have more than just a piece."

"You've always had more than just a piece of me, Fox Mulder." she punched his arm playfully. "You've had my love and friendship and to me that's all of me."

"I'm sorry Dana, your right." he jumped up. "I think I need to get you some more dinner." he pointed to the mess of glass and food on the floor.

Scully laughed. "Don't bother, I'll be down in a few minutes."

"Scul--" he paused. "Dana, I'll call you by name, and you'll call me Mulder." he began to walk out.

"Fox!" Dana cried.

He paused. "Yeah."

"I'll call you by name."

**********

End.....

Stupid huh? Well the next story gets more interesting. Stay tuned

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