My name is Kerry Bone and on October 23, 1996, I gave birth to my preemie son, Tyler, 2lbs 15 oz. I experienced PROM at 31 weeks and labor was unable to be stopped with magnesium sulfate. I was transported to a Level 3 hospital 1 hour from home. I recognized later that I had been suffering from preterm labor from 22 weeks, but it was never acknowledged by my doctor, always called "Braxton-Hicks". I found out the hard way, when the doctor finally checked my contractions that night and told me were "real", just like all the others he didn't check in the past 2 months.
Tyler was delivered by classic C-section (vertical incision) 8 hours from the time my water started leaking. Classic c-section for two reasons: tranverse breech and high, difficult to reach position in the uterus. His apgar scores were 8/8, he could cry, and was taken to the Special Care Nursery after I got a brief glimpse at him.
Tyler followed the typical preemie route - 4 days of ventilator for Respiratory Distress Syndrome, surfactant treatment, O2 by nasal cannula for 6 weeks, apnea and bradycardia, jaundice, Patent Ductus Arteriosis (PDA) - closed with indocin, feeding problems - uncoordinated suck and swallow, slow weight gain, failure to thrive, bad reflux - treated with Zantac and Propulsid, anemia- treated with 1 transfusion, immature vascularization of eyes. Whoa! That sounds like a mouthful, but to other preemie parents, it is just the normal route to home.
Tyler was hospitalized at Baylor Dallas for 57 days. Once home he was on stand-by oxygen for continued bradycardia, as well as an apnea monitor until 9 months of age. In his first year, he has experienced some minor difficulties, mainly with feeding, but has grown more than 6 times his birthweight to 18+lbs. His length at birth - 16" - was over 28" at one year. He was diagnosed with increased muscle tone in the back and legs at 7 months. This has decreased mainly on its own over time. Overall his health is good - no sicknesses or infections of any kind in the first year. One surgery to correct hypospadius - unrelated to his prematurity.
Meeting milestones...
Tyler was slow to meet several milestones in his first year, but when he decided to get on the ball, he went rolling right along. He teethed at 6 months, rolled one way at 6 months, and at 11 1/2 months he rolled the other way and sat unassisted. Between 12-13 months he learned to stand, get into sitting, and cruise.
How We Coped...
In a word, not so well. Tyler's unexpected birth gave rise to the typical preemie emotions and feelings. However, we knew no one who had gone through this, could not find any information on the subject and, as a result, felt very alone, sad, and overwhelmed through the first months. All of it took a toll on our health, our happiness, our relationships with family, friends and each other.
When Tyler was 3 months old, through the help of my sister, I found Tommy's Cybernursery, a website for parents of preemies. What I called it - salvation. Finally I found a place where I was understood. I had support, I had friends who could explain what I was feeling. I had information. I had compassion. Mainly, though, I had hope. Hope that things would improve, I would deal better and our family would move on. It has taken over a year to make that journey back to health, happiness and contentment, but I made it. And I'm proud to say my son and my marriage did too.
I believe everything happens in life for a reason. While many of the reasons surrounding Tyelr's early appearance are difficult to understand, I have learned to be grateful for all that I have gained from his prematurity. Yes, that's right, I have gained from it. And I believe other parents gain from it, too, sometimes it is just not very easy to see ths.
Through this ordeal, I have found a new calling in life - helping other parents cope with the birth of a preemie. I am helping to organize a Parent Group at the NICU at Baylor, I write for a preemie newsletter (see LINKS), and I am now undertaking writing an inspirational book for preemie parents. I am still trying to get premature babies - information, prevention, coping - into the media, but have yet to find a taker. (Oh, and my most important job! I almost forgot - raising my son!!!)
Good luck in your journey - to health, happiness, understanding, wonderful children, whatever you may choose.
"There are no shortcuts to a place worth going"
-Beverly Sills
-Kerry Bone
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