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The definitive movie missskates database : venant à la suite de la précédente; "24" and more...

(or www.John Cassavetes Would Never Do That.Org.) -troisième mi-temps. Or "Partie Three", for our English speaking choums. "FilmInco.", ever more inKOheeeerant since Sep. 2000 -Return Of The Sequel, Loig 7 Allix Thi Van 2001 présente... Suite de la page d'avant (avant le reste de la page d'après) :

 

 

 

VI-Incoherences (eh..... incohérences) at various levels (film, et réception publique)

 

 

 

 

-More incoherences (misc.). (cf. archives)

-"CSI" : episode in which the couple kill their rich landlady and feeds her to the piranhas; so far so good -so to speak- ...but what about the bones ? Are we supposed to believe that the fish also ate the bones ?

"The West Wing" : oh aye, this tiny circle of wise-cracking non-politicians ruling the White House and in effect the worl, very credible...

-"Kill Bill Vol. One" special : After four years in a coma, "the bride" wakes up. But, hey, she doesn't seem to be much concerned about her husband's whereabouts... (Maybe she's seen him die; but the narration, at this stage, hasn't made this clear and therefore entitles us to this remark).
Logically, she should first enquire about him.She has lost strength in her legs -a nice touch clearly ripped off Couland's "Girlfriend In A Coma"- ...but not in her upper arms, which allows to fight to death two big men. Talking of which, how exactly does the rapist die ? It looks like she only bit his lip off...We are told that "the bride" spends thirteen hours in the oh-so amusingly named car trying to regain strength. And during all this time, nobody in the hospital notices that a nurse has gone missing, or notices two corpses in a room. Pretty cool. "Kill Bill Vol. 1" is a fantasy world in which killers go round slaughtering people with no interference from the pesky police.The plane at the end... is it held by strings. This is actually a nice -counting as kitsch- touch. "Kill Bill Vol. 1" : everyone knows that swords can be carried as passenger luggage aboard flights; ah, these crazy Japanese, eh... / Talking of, the film that is supposed to have inspired the Tarantino one, "Female Convict Scorpion : Jailhouse 41", when the heroine gets gangraped, her body doesn't move. The prisoners inside the van don't rock much either, and this despite the bumpy country road they're taking.

"V For Vendetta" : the London police authority does not remember the tube line underneath Westminster. Oh yes.

"Capricorn One" : can someone explain how the journalist guesses, just by discovering the film studio (in an unguarded army base part of a top secret operation, of course), that the three -SPOILER- astronauts are running around in the desert ? Eh ??

The problem with "Blade Runner" : in order to "retire", i.e. kill, these wonderful creatures the Replicants, the hero has to be hard-nosed and ruthless, in other words tone down his sympathy towards them, ...which is precisely what sets humans apart from their robotic doubles. This has led some conspiracy theorists -of which FilmInco is anything but a paid-up member (as if !?! Alas, we get our subsistence from restaurants bins leftovers -but that's another story)- to postulate that "Deckard" himself is a Replicant. Spooky, eh ?

"Fear Dot Com" : OK, so you are a young, attractive, blonde; some bloke in a funny accent turns up out of nowhere, filming you with a Camcorder, and declares that you are the actress he's been looking for all his life; he invites you to a secluded place this very evening for some serious shooting. Do you A) Tell him to go and take a long cold shower ? B) Of course, you go on your own, in a mini-skirt, without telling anyone. (Oh, the film's answer is B, actually.) "Curb Your Enthusiasm", episode "The Doll"; one of the plot's deciding factors is the problem with the toilet -or rather lack of- during the showing of the first episode at the producer's mansion; ...but then there is an abundance of toilets (male and female) at the second night ! The second showing does seem to take place at the same mansion, does it not...

"The Woodsman" (brilliant film) ...would a convicted paedophile be relocated / allowed to relocate opposite a school of all places ?! We don't think so.

"Bubba Ho-Tep" : where do they get that name ? Not exactly everyday vocabulary, is it... ? / For someone with a bad hip, "Elvis" moves surprisingly well at times (problem of continuity here) and why does Ossie Davis aka "JFK" need a wheelchair when he is perfectly nimble at times ?

"Naked Island". As the director himself remarked on the DVD commentary, it doesn't make much sense to water the plants in the heat of the day; farmers do it in the morning and in the evening, otherwise the water evaporates ! His crew and actors were the only ones working at that time ...as the islanders would be napping to escape the sun.

-"Urban Legends". The dean dies lying spiked on his back; but how did he turn ? Same problem : the youth tied to the toilet ...ends up kneeling the other way.

-"24" started so well... But after the, what, fourth episode, it's going all Pete Tong. (for massive chapter deconstructing the whole series, see here)

"The Sixth Sense" leaves us with a few questions. Now, as a film/spectacle, it works fine : the protagonist -SPOILER ALERT- makes his appearances at the right moments, and does not interfere with whom he is not supposed to; BUT... as far as the scenario is concerned, the edifice is a bit more wobbly. The film works on the basis on not just on the audience's cleverly manipulated credulity, but also -and more problematically- on the main character (the psychiatrist)'s suspension of disbelief. We are led to understand that, all along, he didn't know he was a -SPOILER- ghost in limbo. But how exactly did he get along throughout the story time-line ? Did he eat ? Change his clothes ? Drive a car , etc. ? He can't have , since we must assume that, in order to adhere to the plot, the ghost has been wandering, not mixing with anyone but the child. -And, all that time, he wouldn't have realised what was going on ?! Therefore we can only imagine that he just... appears every now and then, blanking out whenever not supposed to deal with the child, unawares of his own absence in-between. Hmm. In any case, one scene still stands out : the child comes home to find his mother sitting with the psychiatrist. Now, how did Willis get in ? She can't have (see here)

Up there with "Dallas" ? The petrol-crazed series had "Bobby Ewing" come back from the dead ...and a disbelieving world continued watching; also in "Dallas", let us remember "Pam Ewing"... she got abducted by aliens. But then again, back in Blighty, one episode of "Neighbours" consisted entirely of a dog's dream -yes. Anything goes, like !

"Sin City" : hang on, didn't the yellow nasty (boo hoo, a rich and protected pedalo -now, that's original!) get his hand blown right off in the early scene by Bruce Willis ? A hell of a great reconstruction job, must have been...

All sorts of remarks (can't be arsed to disseminate them all accordingly) about Spielberg's remake of "War Of The Worlds". Chrono/editing continuity : Tom Cruise doesn't wait for the noise to die down to tell T. Robbins that the invaders have shut up. Similarly, in "Le grand Restaurant", De Funes starts before the three sinister figures actually appear : premonition, eh ! / Missed opportunity : note to the team of "creatives", there is such a thing called the sense of smell. Surely, the killing fields behind the house would have alerted the Cruise man to what's going on on account of, you know, ...stinking to high heaven ? Instead, he just discovers them. / Story : you have to marvel how fast Cruise -and the others- come up with a theory explaining where the machines come from and so on. Why, of course... ! And no (dissenting) discussion on the rather -one would have thought original- subject. Bearing in mind that this is the US of A, a country where 95% of people claim to be believers, one also has to marvel how not a single character posits any divine or infernal intervention theory. / Scenario contradictions : for someone determined to survive or at least go down fighting, T. Robbins changes track rather suddenly does he not. (Ah, but he was upset so... mmmright....maybe...) And Cruise understandably panics when Roberts makes noises only to instruct his daughter, in the next breath, to start singing whilst he deals with the situation ! / All electric/electronic apparatus (apparati ?) are switched off by the attack's EMI (electro-magnetic interference). Every gadget ? No, thankfully there is a camcorder at hand to film the "birth" of the machine. ...But why does this one work ? / Lina Wertmüller's harrowing "Seven Beauties" : how can the protagonist rape the woman on the bed, when she is wearing shorts and has her legs pulled apart ? The next image : she is only wearing a robe which he lifts, ...but he couldn't do so.

 

(from B3ta)

 

 

 

 

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-I'm With Stoopid Section :

Is there anything wrong with my TV ? Watching Jarman's "Blue", I only seem to get the sound but no image ?!??! The screen is all... well... blue ?

"Meet Joe Black". From what this easily confused reviewer understood, the premise seems to be that "Death" has chosen the A. Hopkins character as a "wise" grand old man able to give him/her/it a few tips about men. Wise ? The epitomy of empathy ? The guy is a ruthless captain of industry living in his penthouse for crying out loud ! What about, say, a small village school teacher or an Accident and Emergency nurse ? Could it be that -perish the thought- these life experiences are nowhere near as "glamorous" for capitalist / American audiences ! Now compare, if you will, with the old vilalge doctor of "Captain Corelli's Mandolin"... UPDATE

 

Question : if "Star Trek"'s mission statement is "to boldly go where noone has been" ...how come there's always someone there when "Cap. Kirk" and his crew arrives ? UPDATE

 

Deep from behind the bicycle shed, a lone voice enquires cunningly... : "How Did Dufresne Stick His Wallchart Back Up When He'd Escaped ?" ("The Shawshank Redemption")

When "Superman" changes into his costume ...where does he keep his cape ? tucked into his civvies trousers ??

"Lost" : everyone surely must wonder how come the obscenely obese guy still hasn't shed any weight !

"Equilibrium" : aha, but isn't the anti-emotions fascists' determination to crush the Resistance a manifestation of sensibility in itself ? ...hmm ;-) ?

Massive plot-hole in "Vacancy". So you have this couple inside a motel room barricading their door against some baddies who try to get in by breaking down the door. Read the previous sentence again : in a typical US motel room. Which features a (nearly) wall size slide window. And yet everyone concentrates on the door which some try to go through and some try to keep shut. Why not just, y'know, give the window a kick and they'd be in ? Huh. UPDATE

"The Shooter" : is it credible that a sniper should be a bodybuilder ? Wouldn't his powerful arms, like, lose a degree of finesse... when it comes to squeezing the trigger ?

"It Waits" : how exactly does "Nash"'s body fall off the roof ? Wouldn't it be logical to get up to see who's pushed it ?

"A Snake Of June" : eh, what happens in the middle ?? Dream-like sequence, I'll-be-Frank-don't-call-me-Shirley...

"Revolver". Nuff said. Oh well, let's call it "Mulholland Drive" meets "Fight Club" meets "The Usual Suspects" meets "Angel Heart" meets "Cypher" meets "The Spanish Prisoner". As already stated, you won't be surprised to read that FilmInco will actually defend"Revolver" and asks the simple question : what is wrong about "trying to be clever" ?!! Any film that has the MOR self-appointed guardians of public taste gloat that they didn't understand it -ooh er- has got to be -au contraire- appraised. So Ritchie dares tackle the concept of strategies, he dares use the example of chess ("oooooh, too difficult !"), he busts his arse carefully building a story based on a treble -possibly schizophrenic- manipulation/conspiracy. ...And all the English media can only come up with is the accusation of pretentiousness. Hell yeah, he is "pretentious" ! Brian Eno, in his most recommended Diary of 1995, touches upon that subject, pointing out how, in fact, the accusation of pretentiousness should be borne as a badge of honour. "Revolver" A) explicitly challenges the viewer to use his/her intelligence -no wonder, then, that those who "don't get it" prefer to slag it off wholesale and B) mischievously extols the fun of being conned. Mehtought tht this should have served as a warning... but some people don't have a sense of humour. The very title itself (cf. FilmInco's section page 81) perfectly fits in that strategy, apparently proposing some kind of "shoot 'em up" phallic extravaganza , which induces the "laaaad" type spectator into some comfort zone, ...so as to better destabilise him.

The FilmInco Meister may be getting soft in his later years, but we rather enjoyed "Swordfish". It is, of course, a complete joke. The main point, which somehow seems to have escaped the clever screenwriter's attention, being that cyber-crime should automatically put an end to all that shoot 'em up, car chasing hyperbole. Innit. What is the point of all that action nonsense anymore when, really, all you need as material to depict that new breed of hacking action, is : a comfy chair, a few porn/"Buffy" videos and an unlimited supply of chocolate snacks. And there you have it : computer nerd paradise ! ...But obviously, this doesn't sit -I nearly wrote "compute"- too well with the concept of a Hollywood blockbuster does it... So instead we have pyrotechnics, tits and bombastic soundtrack. Plus the irony of casting gorgeous Hugh Jackman as the hacker is too funny to be overlooked. Question : you are the greatest spy/terrorist in the world planning the biggest bank heist in history thanks to the best hacker on the planet; what do you do ? Do you keep it secret and keep a low profile, or... you hire a super-swanky villa where you give glamourous parties, down the road from the bank in question ? -As I said, we are pretty naive here.

-"The House By The Cemetery" : why doesn't the mother kick the zombie's head off when on the stairs ? ...Instead, of course, she waits for him to catch up. ?!??

"TwentyNine Palms" : the Hummer vehicle gets rammed off the road by a pick-up truck. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't Hummers armoured/reinforced military vehicles ?

"Crank". First we're told that there is no antidote; then, there is one. Ah. And why does the baddie -SPOILER- choose to inject it into the hero ? ... Also : how does the hero find / contact the Hong-Kong crime boss who disappeared ? In less than an hour, too. Cool.

"House Of Wax" : doesn't wax melt at, ahem, a fairly high temperature ? That doesn't seem to bother the heroes at the end of the film, though, when they (SPOILER) fight their way out of the walls and so on.

Surely, nobody would get nicked in most police series if they left town sharpish like, instead of hanging about like bad smells. Especially around the one and only Inspector "Columbo". ...No ?

Another awful film (see right below) : "Battle Royale 2" -why didn't they bomb the island in the first place, if the adults are so incensed by the public enemy number one and his terrorists ? You also have to seriously wonder about a film that presents Afghanistan (as is clearly the country in question) as a haven of peace and freedom -eh???

Why on Earth do "Bullitt"'s killers have to go to the hospital to finish the job (on the prosecution witness) when they have it over and done with at the hotel? Doesn't make sense...

For those in the West who don't "get" "Ju On The Grudge", it may be interesting to know that the film released here is, in fact, the third in a series. Ah.

"Soup For One" : er... what happens to the baby during the day-time and, in fact, most of the time ? Only mentioned in the evening scenes -and he ("Zach") never wakes up screaming either. Parents will appreciate. -By the way, this reviewer also missed who the father was, too, in the first place (but then, we watched at around two a.m.)

"JarHead" : and where / when exactly did the hero learn Arabic ? Forced to spend his time with a bunch of grunts, this seems highly unlikely.

Hang on Reg', how can the dark star in "Star Wars" be so secret when it's, like, ...huge ? Who built it, didn't anyone notice ? A question somehow answered by the mighty brilliant "Cube".

"Collateral" : er, where exactly does Cruise get his laptop -sorry, notebook- from, at the end ? To recall, his suitcase got destroyed so... where / how does he get a new one ? You also have to admire the way "Felix"'s bodyguards smuggle with not a care in the world their massive guns in the Chinese night-club ...where the caid is so fiercely protected. Also... why does Cruise cut off the electricty in the prosecutor's building ? Why does he feel the need to do that... especially when he didn't have any qualms about taking on the Chinese witness and all his bodyguard in full view of a whole crowd ? Eh ??

"Tesis" : the protagonists discover a snuff movie network; yet they don't go report it to the police -eh ?!?? : later, tied up Ana Torent comes to to produce a knife from, er... presumably her sleeve -but the killer hadn't spotted the knife, which didn't slip down her arm or her clenched fist ? You've got yourself a "snuff movie" video to watch; do you a) find a quiet place to watch it in with a box of Kleenex (er... I was only joking, m'Lord) or b) you go and watch it in an unlocked public amphiteatre ? Guess which option the teacher takes... And finally, the cherry on top of the cake : the television decides to broadcast the "snuff" movie -oh aye...

Dubs say the funniest things... Heard in Dublin : why does "Donald Duck" drape a towel around him after bath and "Zippy" insists on putting on pyjamas before going to bed ...yet both parade around naked all day ? And if the Coyote can afford to buy himself a rocket to propel himself after the Roadrunner, why can't he buy himself a simple dinner ?

"The Jungle Book" : Apu the beautiful Indian star is atop an elephant, which is undeniably fidegety, and moving about. But, hey, what's that, when the actor is shown in close-up, he is now completely still !

"Man On The Moon" (spoiler) : but, but, if Kaufman is dead and his sidekick is in the audience, who is posing on stage, in the last scene, as the (spectacularly unfunny) fat crooner ?!

"Starsky And Hutch". What better way to track down criminals undercover than to go around in a spanking red sports car with go-faster stripes on the side, eh ?

"Fear Dot Come" : the "snuff website" plot is logical enough for a while, but then, why / how does the website keep track of the viewers and creates hallucinations ? All of a sudden, the original storyline takes on a supernatural quality that just wasn't needed. And take for instance the final scene : the audience soars as the killing erupts -but how do they know that something is happening online ?

Why are there red dots on "Kill Bill", often when Uma Uma appears ? Someone, on a imdb forum has the answer and we are grateful to him knowledge : "The dots are an anti piracy thing by the MPAA, they appear in several other recent movies ("Ali," "Behind Enemy Lines," "28 Days Later" "Freddy vs. Jason" and "Underworld" for example) and everyone should complain.

Theres a picture at http://www.vcdquality.com/image.php?id=18919 (not sure what movie this is)

Some people say they are to ID the film.. That would be CAP Codes that Kodak created in the 70s, but those are smaller and not the same on each reel. These red dots are big and annoying and always in the shape of a "T". The purpose is when the movie is filmed and compressed into a digital format to be pirated, those dots will become a blurry blob in the frame and hopefully ruin the pirated copy.. Of course there are pirate copies of "kill bill" out already and they simply removed the frames with the dots.

They are annoying to all us PAYING MOVIE WATCHERS who dont pirate.. everyone who was annoyed or confused by them should complain to the MPAA, who assumes everyone is a criminal."

"2046"'s voice-over / point of view. Who is speaking ? Tony Leung (it's in Chinese) or the Japanese guy (the character presented) ?

er... why does everybody burst into song, in the middle of "Magnolia" ? Especially comatose J. Robards and J. Moore ??

"US Marshals" : scene in which Snipes jumps into the bayou. All of a sudden, all of the police forces give up the search, to devote all of their time to Lee Jones who is down. Eh ?? And they just... let the fugitive go, when they know he is in the near area ?

Mr. Naive asks : how exactly do you track down someone by sniffing a girl's crotch ? "Ichi The Killer"

Our ever splendid Carmen (Maura) in "La Communidad" does ( see here )

At the end of "Sex, Lies And Videotapes" : that damn weird couple suddenly start discussing the weather, although the subject never innarested them before; he goes : "It's starting to rain...", she goes : "I know". -Hellooo ?? Is this the meteo channel ?!?

Tim Robbins/Jacob thoughout "Jacob's Ladder" : "but you guys all died there...". -Eh ??! Tell you what, I got so confused/annoyed I left before the end. (PS before I get more outraged mail : this was a joke.)

Steve Buscemi as the most ruthless hitman in America, in "Ten Things To Do In Denver... -Steve Buscemi ?!!

"The Osbournes", in an ironic way, is much better beeped (as in the MTV version) than uncensored, complete with continuous "F" words (on Channel Four). Discuss.

Also, can someone explain the end of Kiarostami's "Taste Of Cherry" ? Many thanks in advance, and don't give me the "it was all a dream" chestnut, please.

In "Big", Tom Hanks becomes a small boy in the end, what's "big" about it ?! (-err... why don't you try and watch the film in its entirety next time ? Ed.'s voice) OK then, but even so, changing into a small boy is still not possible ! (-It's MAGIC, ya cretin !! Ed.) (Sorry for that interruption, readers.)

If "E.T." can fly his bike with "Elliott", why doesn't he take off towards his spaceshift, in the first scene, instead of getting stranded on planet Earth ?

Murnau's "Caligula"... isn't its story weirdly reminiscent of B. Stoker's "Dracula", down to its every detail ...? Huh. ("Shadow Of The Vampire" explains that the author's family had refused to give the rights for adaptation.) (No shit Sherlock, UPDATE : Mrs. Stoker hired lawyers to prevent the film from being shown in Britain.) "Deep Impact" and "Armageddon" (whic came out at the same time, too) : er... isn't that the same story ? "Heat" and "LA Takedown" ? Why doesn't Mann go after the other film's director and sue him, eh ? FilmInco also enjoyed that curiosity : "Resurrection", with C. Lambert : mix "Slice The Lambs" with "Se7en", throw in "French Connection"'s car chase in the middle for good measure, et... voilà ! -but maybe, we woz a bit cynical that night. Go feur it, Christophe ! Les films de Bertrand Blier... comparez "les Valseuses" et "Tenue de Soirée" avec leurs duos/trios incluant une pseudo innocente au milieu... I mean, "The Soul Collector" : an angel decides to stay on Earth with his new found love, thereby becoming a mere mortal ...wasn't that Wenders' s "Wings Of Desire" ? The incestuous love story between two prodigees in "The Royal Tenenbaums"...isn't that kinda "Hotel New Hampshiresque" ? Another totally accidental resemblance : the start of Aldrich's "Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte" and, thirty years later, Carpenter's classic "Halloween"... "CSI" rehashes "The Cable Guy" plot. "Star Wars" and Kurosawa's "The Hidden Fortress". Mario Bava's "Planet Of The Vampires" (1965) provided the entire premise to "Alien"'s start, which was also inspired by the same screenwriter's "Dark Star" (directed by J. Carpenter a couple of years beforehand); Carpenter's amazing "The Thing" was rehashed by the "X Files" : the "Ice" episode. Gary Sherman's "Dead And Buried" (check out its excellent poster) and W. Huyck's "Messiah Of Evil" : very similar plots. Gordon Lewis's naughty nudie "Adventures Of Lucky Pierre" (shot in four days) was, er..., inspired by Russ Meyer's "The Immoral Mr. Teas". Separated at birth : "Mere Yaar Ki Shaadi Hai" with the gorgeous Sanjana, "My Best Friend's Wedding" "Kuchh Kuchh Hota Hai", and "Dil Waale Dulhaniya Le Jaayenge" ... ... hmm... ? Eight months ago, "Kaante" -a musical take on "Reservoir Dogs"- was released among Hollywood bluster about rights, exclusivity and whatnot. Then someone remembered how strangely reminiscent of Ringo Lam's "City Of Fire" the "Dogs" were.

(Adapted from IMDB forum) More "coincidences" : "Sonic Impact" and "Airport 1975" : same plane name "Columbia", same explosion location on the plain. Same scene of lowering a person into the hole... "The Magnificent Seven" is a clone of "The Seven Samurai", "Pretty Woman" and "My Fair Lady", "West Side Story" and "Romeo and Juliette", "Boys And Girls" - "When Harry Met Sally", "You've Got Mail" a remake of "Shop Around The Corner"; "Sleepless in Seattle" is a (blatant clone) of "An Affair to Remember", but "You've got Mail" is a variation of the theme of both of the other two movies. "The Shawshank Redemption" an update of "The Count of Monte Cristo". Larry Buchanan made at least four movies that were direct remakes of previous AIP movies : "The Eye Creatures" (1965) retold "Invasion of the Saucermen"; "Zontar the Thing from Venus" (1966) = "It Conquered the World"; "Creature of Destruction" (1967) = "She Creature"; "In the Year 2889" (1967) = "The Day the World Ended". Writing credits do not acknowledge source material, but these remakes were authrorized by AIP. Also (but not one of Buchanan's): "Forbidden World" (1982) was an unabashed "Alien" clone. So what? you may ask; there were (and still are) plenty of those. But "Forbidden World" was remade as "Dead Space" (1991). Again, writing credits do not cite the previous version. Therefore, "Dead Space" is a remake of a rip-off. Make of that what you will. "Daylight" : "Poseidon" not under water ? "The Fugitive" and "US Marshals" : it's the same film, with a plane crash instead of a train. "Devil in the Flesh" and "Devil in the Flesh 2" are like the exact same thing.

(cf. archive for much more)

"Ring"'s main plotline is flawed and deceitful !! I mean, I watched the damning video in question... and I'm still alive ! So...they lied to us, dunnit ?! Or could it be... this is the ultimate commercial incentive : if you don't want to die, buy the video / DVD and play it to a friend, ha ha ha, and you will survive ! Clever, that, eh...

The-god-awful-"Within Striking Distance" : so river cop Bruce Willis blows up this car, right ? It turns out not to be the killer's vehicle. And he just... gets away with it, then. Especially in America, which litigation industry probably almost rivals their porn business. Yeah, right.

 

 

The Can Someone Explain Section.

Start of the classic "Man Who Fell To Earth" : who -on Earth, hee hee- is (rest of chapter at the archive)

"Superman II" : er...how exactly does he recover his strength ? After we've been told that neutering himself for the sake of procreation would rob him of his powers -and here we quote- "forever". Next thing you know, he picks up a crystal, and... is fixed ? How ?? Rip-off !

"The Devil And Daniel Johnston" : why isn't there any mention of Mark Linkous aka Sparklehorse ? When the great man took upon himself to record and produce an album by Johnston.

The ever-wonderful "Magnolia" : hang on, how does the great William H. unlock the door of his ex-place of employment to return the money at the end of the film ...since he broke his key ?

The excellent "Infernal Affairs". When the I.A. cops are looking for the mole after the hotel murder (shall we say, to avoid revealing what happens), surely all they need to do is to look at the CCTV footage of who get in the lift on his way to the meeting on the rooftop ? Huh.

"Hannibal Rising" : why should a French police inspector, right after WW2, care about one murder that took place more than eight years before at the other side of Europe (in Lithuania) ? How come that policeman has so much power, time and personnel to go on about searching various places and so on ? Grotesque film...

 

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"The Incredibles". First question : since the superoutfit doesn't feature any superpocket, where exactly is "ElastiGirl" supposed to keep the tracking device cards showing her where her superfamily is ? Hmm ? Also -cf. "structural fault" section- why does the superdaughter have two superabilities, as opposed to her superrelatives ? 'Bit of a lack of cohesion here, mesuperthinks. (...Could it be because both of them will come in superhandy at some stage otherwise we would be up the supercreek...)

Jet Li in "Romeo Must Die" : looking for a car in a car-park, he beeps the car remote control in one direction, and the car situated behind him "responds". Is this possible ?

(The great) John Sayles's "Lone Ranger" : bizarre change of heart courtesy of "Mrs. Cruz", who suddenly accepts to help the illegal immigrants, after brief flash-back... Was her life story more developed, originally ? (The legendary) Dario Argento's "Profondo Rosso" : Hemmings agrees to get back to his deliciously alluring Italian companion's place; then suddenly announces that he can't, as he's forgotten something...; the two exchange a would-be meaningful look, and... cut to the next morning, back to the murderer chase. What on Earth was that about ??

"Charmed" : one of the three sisters has her brains sucked out by the evil doctor with the stabbing finger and falls into a coma; then the "Warlock" gets annihilated by the two other witches. She then wakes up as if nothing had happened and doesn't need to have her soul reinstalled, as shown previously with another victim. Er...

"Ichi The Killer" : why does "Jiji" confuse his puppet killer at the end, telling him that one of his victims is his long lost brother ?? Plus the ending : there is a debate on IMDB as to what it exactly means : is sado-maso "Kohi" finally in hell ? It seems to me, if anything, that it is paves the way for a sequel to come, but any theory is welcome here.

Can someone explain... the significance of "Lost In Translation"'s opening shot , i.e. Scarlett Johansson's bum ? Now, lovely and perfectly formed as the divine miss Johansson's bum unquestionably is, we rather fail to "get" it. Should we conclude that Coppola is -hee hee- talking out of her arse... ?!

 

 

 

Logic and inferences (déductions). Esp. with regards to previous section. Humour is based on references; something is funny, because its timely revelation stands in contradiction with what should, logically, follow from its premise. Take, for instance, one of the subtlest cultural jokes in "Men In Black" : one of the agents (W. Smith) picks up this -howdyoucallit- ethnic ornament from the road, and deduces that the monster has borrowed... a taxi as a getaway car. Now, for viewers who haven't been to NYC, this shouldn't make any sense. But anybody who has ever taken a cab there will know that (...the rest here) . Exemple de titre : "...comme la lune", du négligé Joël Seria : c'est au spectateur de reconstituer le titre complet, c'est à dire l'expression "con comme la lune". Même remarque : "...comme elle respire" = expression "elle ment comme elle respire".

 

Which highlights , by contrast, some films' total lack of subtlety. The Hollywood "In Your Face" attitude, where everything has to be spelled out, detailed, and even repeated, under different angles (any climactic explosion, for ex., has to be shown three times). Watching "E.T." again, lately, I was amazed how heavy-handed it now looks : all the kids lining up on their bikes, one after the excruciating other, the repeated close-ups on the (absent father figure)'s groin region, etc.. Anyone familiar with "Superman" comics here ? What struck me, when I was a kid -and by contrast with "Batman"- was its insistence upon explaining each time, in details, where this week's monsters came from. Cf. gimmicks used in "X Files, The Movie" : for the innocent who don't know what the preceding series was about, at several points do its heroes heavy-handedly recall where they're from, who they are, etc.. For instance, "Mulder" and "Scully" are asked to explain themselves to yet another FBI investigative committee early in the movie, which handily provides more opportunities for "the story so far", and an intoxicated "Mulder" takes up a bored waittress's customary query "sowhassup ?" a little too literally : conspiracy theories, nickname, details, inside leg measurements, and all. / "Freddy vs. Jason" -or is it the other way round- spends about 12 minutes recapping who its two protagonists are, which seems uterly pointless since it can be safely assumed that the huge majority of its audience already knows bloody well who "Freddy Kruger" and "Friday The 13th"'s "Jason" are ! But it is not (pointless), since what the authors are clearly trying to do here is fill up their semblance of a film to an acceptable near 90 minutes. And fool noone. UPDATE

"Sliding Doors" is a film composed almost entirely of explicit reminders, presumably for those who can't follow the plot or/and need to have everything spelled out, such as -starting with the first sex scene : "Oh, remind me, why we're shagging ? -Well, that's because you are so-and-so and I do this-and-that" etc. throughout the entire movie : -Main character : "Oh, why do I do this ?" Ever-reliable best friend : -It's because..." every five minutes, oh aye... (now, shouldn't I need to remind myself why I am writing this ?) / "Demons" one and two is a brilliant example of (two films) where the characters keep exclaiming "look at her back !" "look at her nails" to draw attention to what is so effing clearly happening. The same kind of character who, chased by, well, ... demons, stop to shout to their comrades "we 'gotta get out of here !" -no shit Sherlock.

Another great example : "Speed Two", in which the baddie, Willem Dafoe, spends the entire movie explaining to his victims why he does what he does. Now, first of all, we don't need to be told another motive than the one already presented : jewels theft. Secondly, do bank-robbers take time to expand upon their (private) lives, when in the middle of a heist, going : "Oh, folks, by the way, I'm only engaging in a criminal activity today because my absent father didn't paid my mother alimony / a multinational screwed me out of my job, etc.; would it be for these circumstances, I am a really decent guy, I swear." Nope, they probably want to get on with the job at hand, and get the hell out as soon as possible. But not in "Speed 2".

Cf. also "Lost Weekend" 's flashback, as R. Milland recounts how he ended there; the wonderful's "la Fille sur le pont", where V. Paradis starts the film by answering questions about her past, etc. By contrast, Hal Hartley's early films always started "ex nihilo" : no such exposition, A. Barbeau or M. Donovan just burst onto the screen space, already engaged in their actions / destiny, and it's up to us the audience to fill in the blanks (such as who is she/he ? what is she/he like ? etc.), making us feel like close friends of theirs (empathy). Same remark : Cassavetes's movies. A good recent example of gradual revelations : the héroïne of "Resident Evil", whose memory comes back bit by bit, at crucial moments. / The-godawful-"Within Striking Distance" : the baddie at the end tells us -and we mean all- about why, when, what, how. Very naturally, of course.

In the other direction, we have "DreamCatcher". What happens is, this film multiplies astounding revelations, going through one cliffhanger to the next without taking the time to dwell on it (a bit like "Spiderman 3" and its structural weakness with articulations: one minute the hero looks at the black suit, the next he has gayfully abandoned any moral quibble and embraced darkness). At this stage, I must write this "SPOILERS AHEAD". The film has about 3 or 4 parts which could all be a subjet themselves; roughly speaking, how the kids rescued that weird guy who gave them superpowers; where on Earth did these aliens come from; what is going on between the various army factions. All the potential storythreads are sprinted through without any due consideration; by the time you're starting to get to grips with, for example, this mysterious red dust, you have a vaguely phallic slash indentada vagina Cronenberg-type monster; then a big alien; then an extraterrestrial invasion; then an army conspiracy; then an internal army war -and so on. Basically, and here is what this critique made of the "scattered" film, it feels as if the movie was an adaptation of a 600 pages sci-fi blockbuster condensed into 100-odd minutes.

 

 

It is interesting to know the "Groundhog Day" background. The scriptwriter, whose brilliant scenario had been initially rejected by everyone, was told by the producing party to come up with a reason for the repetition affecting the protagonist. Among the various versions : a gipsy curse cast by the hero's recently jilted girlfriend, a discussion with a scientist mentioning the possibility of a time-travel singularity and so on. Director Ramis, who seems to have been on the writer's side, told him to write one in any case, "that (he) might -or might not shoot at all". In the end, of course, there is simply no rationale whatsoever ....and does it spoil our pleasure ? Nope.

 

 

 

A few examples of visual gags based on anticipation : the Monty Pythons, I think, with the giant phone ringing. We the audience imagine it to be that size because of its position at the foreground, but no, someones appears and picks up the genuinely gigantic thing. Also, in "Top Secret !" : a man wearing a magnifying glass to one -suitably monstrous- eye; guess what ? he lowers his magnifying glass, and his eye really is that size ! Same idea later with a scene seen through binoculars... which turn out to be a partition through which cows pass.

 

 

(Unnecessary) Revelations. "Irma Vep" -la vision finale du génial metteur en scène J.-P. Léaud, son film abandonné : ?!?? Quid , quoi qu'est-ce ? Censé être une parodie de, par example, Godard, ou bien un réel chef d'oeuvre irrémédiablement perdu ? Personnellement,... eh...j'ai aimé. Ou n'aurais-je pas dû ? Un peu comme le dernier livre de J. Irving, et sa soi-disante grande romancière, qui écrit -désolé, Johnny- comme un pied -et il faut que je revienne à l'anglais là, car c'est en cette langue que je l'ai lu. Brief literary interlude, if you please -but with cinematographic resonances, not to worry. In Irving's last novel , "A Widow For A Year", the so-called brilliant writer "Ruth" : huh. Que ? No disrespect, but the few pages quoted are stylistically nothing remarkable, as banal as Irving's own usual "pedestrian" style. Not only that, but 1)-besides her sounding, if anything, very flat indeed, 2) all the novelists presented within write with the same voice ! The problem/point with quoting different characters -in cinema as well as in literature- is to differentiate them, give them distinctive styles/personalities. And I'm afraid Irving -who I love dearly, let it be known- fails in that instance. Mind you, all of Coupland's characters speak with the same post-everything, intelligent, wacky, ironic tone. I want to live in a Coupland world. But to come back to the original point : how, indeedy, can genius be expressed ? Lesser mortals like us can't fake it, we can only boast it for so long and then... Then, you don't actually have to propose any would-be proof, is Hal Hartley's clever answer in the terrific "Henry Fool". The Nobel Prize poet's words are never to be quoted, he, he. Same register, different subject : in Bunuel's "Belle de Jour", the ultimate taboo object of repulsion, which every prostitute refuses... is never shown. See what I mean ? cf. remark, elsewhere, about "American Beauty"'s laughable "Eureka" vision. Van Sant's "Psycho" : why the last scene, in which "Bates"' motivations are spellt out for those who have been asleep at the back of the classroom since 1960 ?

cf. the remark on "Ring" above; the Monty Pythons famously had a gag about a secret weapon : the ultimate joke, that, once told, would make its listeners die with laughter. Crucially, the text of the joke was never revealed. ...or we would die too !

"24" : FilmInco love the way characters talk about (i.e. spell out) murder, rape and so on so openly, in public and over the phone, oh yes.

From FilmInco's faithful contributor Lisette : "I went to see "Murder by Numbers" last night. Since it was midnight, I had the sense to cover my eyes anytime the music told me something creepy was going to happen, je ne veux pas de cauchmares. Still I noticed that the stupid detective woman went in after the kids on her own, even though she knew help was on the way. How much sense does it require to wait and go in together instead of putting yourself in unnecessary danger? The whole film suffered too much from "guess what's going to happen now? That's righhhhhht!!!!" ...but on the plus side, you knew when it was going to be nasty and you should shut your eyes."

 

 

Would-be genius twist section. Imitation is endemic. As soon as someone comes up with a clever trick to wrangle one's characters out of a hairy situation, everyone appropriates it. Take for instance "Silence Of The Lambs"'s ingenious jail breakout, in which you-know-who, trapped in a can't win situation, takes on an injured cop's identity and simply waits, rather than actually attempting to physically escape. A couple of years later, "Leon" pulls the same neat trick, with Jean Reno, cornered in a hotel room, taking on a SWAT commando member's gear. (I would hate to say I had guessed but, in fact, ...I hadn't.) (Only kidding, I had.) Press forward to "Ocean's Eleven" : and guess how the gang gets out of the casino vault ? That's right, by dressing up as body armoured fully helmeted police agents. In this respect, "expect the unexpected" takes on a new meaning; "expect what once was the unexpected", more like, as they become the norm.

These examples represent, of course, but one meager instance of film stories, even though the said films depend on it; the principle probably applies to just about any convention developed since the Lumière brothers, Mack Senett or Buster Keaton. Everybody since can be said to have been riding on the wings of a few ground breaking inventors like O. Welles or Jean Vigo.

Then again, the ultimate twist might be in... not having a surprise twist at all ! "Town On Trial"'s killer turns out to be, well, the fall guy who was the suspect throughout the story, accused by the town doctor. What's the effing point of expecting the ending, then !

 

 

 

 

-No error, in fact.

 

Hannibal "Lektor", in the brilliant "Manhunter"/"Red Dragoon" : genuine, original spelling.

"Ocean's12" : why would the head of a fictive European police force have a Southern American (Texan-like) accent ? ...Unless of course that cop turns out to be the mother of one of the Americans !

"Dhoom 2" : surely the fistfight between the awesomely bodybuilt Hrithik (phew ! gasp ! swoon) and the, er, normal cop is scaling the heights of surrealism. Ah but... could it be the evil genius is just pretending as a prelude to a stunt...

Double whammy here (see also the "private joke" chapter) : in "Valentine", Boreanaz utters this line : "I"m no angel, but I'm no killer either." Aha, but everyone knows he is "Angel", in the "Buffy" spin-off TV series -he is lying ! Henceforth...

For those who wondered about the weird (clearly CGI added) blood spurts in "Zatoichi", Kitano explained that such was the intention; he was actually worried about the amount of violence and wanted the blood ejaculations to look like "flowers" (hana, in Japanese).

"Fulltime Killer": the cinema loving hitman refers to a film with Alain Delon (must be "Le Samourai") in which someones gets stabbed through the hand and nailed to the bar. Later on, the victim complains he hasn't been able to track down the film in question. Well of course -and feel free to correct us if we got it wrong ourselves-, ...since this gory instance does not take place in any Delon movie, but in "The Godfather"!

"Riky-Oh": if one the four prison wing guvnors looks a bit camp, there is a good reason why: it's a (Japanese) actress! Also, if you can't help wondering about the main actor's evolving physique, it is because the kung-fu expert was told to put on (demonstrably bigger) muscles so as to impress foreign audiences who might not recognise his artistry; therefore, he constantly indulged in body-building sessions as the film got shot, ending up more voluminous than he started.

"Buffy"'s sister : where does she come from ??? (well... explained 3 episodes later : she's not her sister, but..."The Key". Ah. QED.)

Boom mike visible on "American Movie, the making of etc." (Loïg's advice : just rush and rent it on video, it's ... wonderful) : it IS a documentary.

"The Usual Suspects". For a low-life nobody, Our-Friend-Kevin "Verbal" is surprisingly able to recognise Hungarian (scene at the dock, Keaton asks what language the sailors are speaking). ...Or should this be significant ? Cf., as well, page four , section on weird dialogue.

"The Truman Show" : "Truman" and his pal watch both the sun and the full moon set, a scientific impossibility. Or is it that... -Also : when he tries to board the bus, the vehicle breaks down, with smoke all-too spectacularly rising. Hmm... Also cf. page four , section on weird dialogue..

A few months back, I wondered aloud why extra-terrestrials should have a vague humanoid appearance, for example in "Star Trek". FilmInco reader, and part-time Trekkie (if I may say so ?) "errl grey" (presumably not his real name) replies : "the reason for this was finally explained towards the end of the "Next Generation" series : ....the romulans, klingons, humans, and more species (unsure) fight over clues spread all over our galaxy. In the end they see that they are all pieces of a puzzle left by the original humanoids that inhabited a dying planet in our solar system millions of years ago. When combined it tells the story of how their race was dying and they implanted their DNA into the primitive soup on many planets that they thought might support life in the future. Millions of years later, all of the races have evolved with similar characteristics ( man size, with two eyes, four limbs etc..) but the differences come from the specific characteristics native to the different planets; that is why they all appear similar but have "slight differences". -Aha !! Thanks for clearing that up.

"Through A Scanner Darkly" : it would seem strange that agent "Fred"'s superior (whose identity wasn't much hard to guess) doesn't mind -in effect- inviting his girlfriend to what is a super secret antinarcs police station, when the issue of confidentiality has been super high all long.... Ah yes, but by now the game is up, what with poor "Fred" well and truly gone on his way to the funny farm, as well as, more importantly, -SPOILER- the issue of the girlfriend coming to pick him up being oh so slightly artificial, if you see what Phil K. Dick/Linklater mean.

Early in "Fight Club". Something about E. Norton giving/receiving a phone call even though "no incoming call" message shows. i.e. there's something fishy, here...

Right, and let's jump right into it : some naive viewers might have gasped at the casualness carelessly exhibited by the writer and producers of the "The West Wing" TV series when they devoted whole entire episodes to a trifling private life incident concerning one of the White House aides heroes ...and about five minutes to the bombing of an Arab State ?!? ...But isn't it on the contrary rather indicative of the mood in American politics : bombing the Third World -who cares ? Sex life in the US -huge deal !

 

pour d'autres remarques encore meilleures...

 

 

 

 

Michelangelo Antonioni : "Meaning (senso) , it's an instrument of power; so, to make the meaning subtle is a political act just as it always is : to seek to shred, to disrupt, to break down this mania for meaning (fanatismo del senso)."