Doom Addiction




You know you're a Doom addict if...


1: You can beat Spider Demons with your fist.

2: You have all the Doom novels, including the sucky 3rd and 4th ones.

3: You create a Doom level with a hundred zombie men. And a line of barrels straight through the middle.

4: You reconfigure the Doom game playing on the office store computer so it runs faster and smoother.

5: Your parents ask 'What does BFG9000' stand for? And you tell them.

6: You stand in front of the chainsaw section at Home Depot and laugh manically.

7: You activate God Mode, Nightmare level and acquire the Beserk Pack just to go around splattering bad guys.

8: You take a bullet just so you can punch a bad guy off a ledge and watch him fall.

9: You make the bad guys walk under the descending celings just to watch them splatter.

10: You create a Doom WAD of your own house.

11: You create Doom WAD of every house on your block.

12: You break into people's house to get the measurments of their bathrooms.


Prose