Melrose Place
Episode #107 / Season #4
Title: "El Syd"
Original Air Date: Monday, November 06, 1995

Synopsis

[Wilshire Memorial Hospital]

Episode opens with Amanda draped over Jack's limp body. The way Amanda's jeans stare you in the face, you expect her to say, "I wear Calvins, or I wear nothing at all." You find yourself more interested in the label on her jeans than Jack's condition. Sydney's in the doorway, believing she just witnessed Amanda murdering Jack by yanking out those hoses he's been deep-throating for the past three weeks. "Code Blue" echoes through the hospital (I guess that means the patient has no oxygen?) Amanda just sits there in shock, so Syd rushes in and reinserts the hoses into Jack's awaiting orafice, using a hanky so as not to leave fingerprints on the hoses, but careless enough to leave a thumbprint on Jack's chin. Moments later, that starvationally-challenged, infatuated nurse comes rolling in, huffing and puffing. She sees Jack's condition, hits the intercom and yells, "Code Blue! Code Blue! And bring a donut cart STAT! I need sugar!" She begins chest massage on Jack which she's been dying to do. Unfortunately, she's soon interrupted as the room fills up like an overcrowded dance floor. Michael arrives and does his version of the electric slide, zapping Jack a couple of times with those paddle doohickeys but to no avail. Finally, the day we've all been waiting for, including Amanda -- Jack is dead! A sigh of relief radiates from her face when Michael informs her that this time it's for good.

[Peter's House]

Peter is waiting for Kimmy to return. He found her Dick Tracy wrist bracelet but with no Kimberly attached. She enters and Peter begins scolding her but the sight of her mangled hand stops him cold. She explains how she would've gnawed off a limb if necessary, to escape from this roach motel of Peter's. Then she describes her new career at K-CHAT as a radio DJ named "Cockroach-Kimmy." Peter is glad that no one really listens to that show except other psychos because if the police ever found out what she did they'd both be in trouble. The phone rings and Amanda tells Peter about Jack's death. Jack rushes off to the hospital, trusting Kimberly to be a good girl.

[Wilshire Memorial Hospital]

While Amanda awaits Jack's arrival, Michael approaches her. He tells her that he just signed the death certificate but that Jack's body must undergo an autopsy. Amanda is worried; maybe they'll find Syd's thumbprint and suspect something. Michael had noticed that Jack's breathing apparatus was tampered with, saying, "Jack's body had been moved, and people in a coma don't normally move much. C'mon, Amanda, if there was any hanky-panky I want to know about it." "Michael, I may be many things, but I'm no necrophiliac!" Amanda counters. Peter arrives and pulls Amanda aside. She explains how Jack woke with super human strength and tried to kill her but then went limp, and that Sydney witnessed the whole thing. Meanwhile, Michael sees Sydney lurking around and asks her what she knows. She grins and replies, "I know everything Michael."

[MP, Courtyard]

Jake has a hangover; he dumps a couple dozen "empties" from the night before into the Melrose Place recycling bin. He may be a sleazy scumbag with no respect for women, but at least he cares for the environment! Matt has just received a letter informing him that he has been readmitted to medical school. Matt runs over and grabs Jake. He's so happy he almost gives Jake a wet one but Jake is sober enough to rebuff Matt's advances. Jake feigns interest in Matt's delight as long as Matt will have the celebration party at Shooters. Jo runs into Jake on her way to the airport. She's mad that he did Shelly just to get back at her for playing with Richard's "hart". Knowing she's on her way to Hawaii to get some Dick, he tells her, "When the two of you are through, I hope he says, 'Mahalo.' which translates to, 'Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am!'" She slaps him and leaves.

[Hayley's Mansion]

Hayley proposes to Alison as though it was just another business deal, saying, "We might just move into phase two, and get married." Obviously, he hasn't had much need for romance in the past since the last time he proposed it was because he got Laura pregnant with Brooke.

[Mid-Wilshire Professional Building]

Michael and Peter are sitting around waiting for work and losing their "patience." Just then, some guy comes in asking for Dr. Burns AND Dr. Mancini. Could they be getting their "patients" back? Nope, it's just a courier who delivers both of them an invitation to dinner at Ito's. Amanda drops by showing them her invitation, too. Sydney is no where to be found, which is unusual since this is her only place of employment.

[Shooters]

Alison arrives looking for Jo. Jake tells her Jo's working overtime, banging the boss in Hawaii. Alison can't believe all the sex, lies, and cassette tape she's missed since moving out of the building one day ago! Since Jo is off excersing, Alison figures Jake's the next best thing and confides in him regarding Hayley's proposal. Jake tells her that she can't marry Hayley until she gets over Billy. Alison questions if it's possible to ever get over an old love affair. Jake tells her its easy -- he does it all the time. All she has to do is sleep with Billy again and see how it feels. She recalls that Billy is working late that night and reminisces the times they used to do it on the conference room table. Jake tells her that's perfect and that she should run right over and see him. Good advice seems more like a disease on this show.

[D&D Advertising]

Alison finds Billy burning the midnight oil on the Friar Brothers Winery account. He has to fly up to Santa Barbara tomorrow for a one day presentation. Brooke will be going with him. The whole time Alison is standing there with her tongue hanging out. Billy, although dumb as a doorknob, finally asks her, "Is there anything on your mind?" But before Alison can ask Billy to sleep with him one last time, Brooke enters and asks Alison why she's there so late? For that matter we wonder why Brooke is there at that late hour? Alison leaves and Brooke says to Billy, "All that's important is our little secret that is growing inside of me. Can you tell I'm 3 weeks pregnant?" as she rubs her belly. "Definitely" says Billy. Yeah, right! At first you figure he's lying, but then they kiss, and you realize it must be her morning sickness breath that gives it away!!

[Ito's Japanese Restaurant]

Judge Ito's Japanese steak house, #1 users of the ginzu knife. (Ed. note: They seem to have been missing one since June of '94.) Amanda, Peter, and Michael are all sitting uncomfortably on the floor waiting for Sydney, who finally shows up dressed up as a geisha girl. Guess she couldn't get the call girl out of her system. Showing the cassette tape she made, she blackmails Amanda into getting one-half of whatever she inherits from Jack's estate, and wants Peter there to make sure Amanda fulfills her wish. As for Michael, she wants nothing -- as long as he stays and dines with her. She suggests sashimi, figuring the smell of raw fish might remind him of old times together.

[MP, Billy & Brooke's Apartment]

Brooke can't go on the business trip with Billy due to her recurring morning sickness. Alison brings over the layouts and informs them that she plans on going with Billy to Santa Barbara to help on the account presentation. They leave as Brooke does her best Linda Blair impersonation. Yeah, maybe she isn't really pregnant after all but is merely possessed!

[Mid-Wilshire Professional Building]

The next morning Michael arrives and is greeted by Sydney. She reassures him that she wants nothing. As long as he takes her to Matt's celebration being held at Shooter's that night.

[Waikiki, Oahu]

The scene opens showing palm trees, Diamond Head, millions of hotels, and people running around wearing aloha shirts and leis. Then a sub-title appears informing the viewers that it's Hawaii. Good thing, otherwise they might have confused it with Rosarito Beach, Mexico! "Dick" Hart, bored and lonely, gets a call from Jo. Richard can't believe how clear her voice is; it's almost as though she's calling from a pay phone on the other side of the pool. He tells her how much he misses her which is all it takes to get her to come running. They engage in a Kodak moment. Jo discloses that she and Jake are over for good. Richard responds by saying, "Well Jo, like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives." This gets Jo hot and horny, but she resists, claiming that she wants it to be strictly business between them for now. She doesn't want to be on the rebound when she decides to pounce on him.

[Mid-Wilshire Professional Building]

Jack's lawyer, Diamond, is harassing Amanda. He's onto them about Jack's injury. This time, however, she plans to stick around and fight. Peter wonders how to get the lawyer out of her life, and Kimberly out of his. "Does it sound too corny to sing, 'I am woman hear me roar, I killed Jack 'cuz he's a bore...'?" she asks. They kiss. I guess with all the trauma, Amanda forgot that Peter tried to kill her in the OR last season!

[Shooters]

Matt's party. Some fun. All you hear is Jake whining about Jo, and Jane whining about Richard. Michael calls Matt over to congratulate him on his marginally passing grade. He shows Matt his score -- before and after. Matt is furious. How can go on through medical school living a lie. It took him years to come out of the closet about his homosexuality, how many more years can he live hiding this? (Probably not too long, as people will start to wonder why all his patients keep dying once he finally becomes a doctor.) Matt figures Michael did this in order to get Matt under his thumb (What's with all the Rolling Stones reference lately?) Michael says he's just paying him back for changing a number for him a couple years back. Michael states, "You rub my back, I'll rub yours." The thought of this really excites Matt so he shuts up and smiles.

[Waikiki Hotel]

Jane, after slamming Richard's name at Shooters with Jake, goes home and calls him, asking if it's not too late for the two of them. But while they're talking, Jo pops in and swanks over to Richard. He stammers something to Jane about discussing matters when he returns, which she readily accepts. He barely has a chance to hang up when Jo rips off his bath towel. "It's been 10 minutes and I'm not on the rebound anymore. I'm through taking things slowly." she purrs, as she throws him into a chair and starts to devour him. In her best Hawaiian accent, she manages to utter, "Kamana wana lei u!" Despite her hideous outfit, Richard consents.

[Hayley's Mansion]

Hayley is packing up items in the shrine to Brooke's mother, Laura. Brooke just happens to stop by and freaks out. She believes daddy is replacing her mother with Alison. But before he can defend himself, he gets a phone call, informing him that the plane Alison and Billy were on is missing. Wonder who made the call, and how they knew to call Hayley at his unlisted phone number?

[Dry Lake Bed, Night]

Billy and Alison are sitting around a campfire. The pilot, Alex, decides to hike into town for help, leaving Billy and Alison alone. Alison admits that she still wants him to hold her, kiss her, make her write bad checks. She still had hopes. But Billy dashes any dreams she might have had by telling her that Brooke is pregnant. Alison can't believe it, saying, "That's impossible. You've only been married for a few months. How can that happen?" She's about as dense as Billy, and you realize this couple was a match made in heaven. Billy says that even if he wanted to do those things to Alison, it's too late. Alison storms off in a fit of anger. The next morning, she apologizes for her behavior, and wishes Billy and Brooke the best. It's helped make her decision easier. He gives her one of his patented fish lip kisses.

[Hayley's Mansion]

The same morning. Brooke is still at the house. Hayley gets a phone call informing him and Brooke that Alison and Billy are OK. Brooke, relieved that her hubby is all right, breaks the news to daddy about being pregnant by vomiting all over the living room sofa. This catches Hayley offguard. She asks if she and Billy and Billy Jr. could move into the guest cottage since it would be a much nicer place than their ratty apartment.

[MP, Amanda's Apartment]

Peter brings over the autopsy results : A ruptured artery in the brain was the cause of Jack's death. Although it had nothing to do with the removal of the scuba gear, it was still related to the original "accident." Amanda doesn't really care to have anything to do with inheriting any of the blood-money from the estate, so Peter figures Amanda can cut a deal with Diamond -- give up the estate in return for the sealing of the autopsy results. Then they concoct a plan to use Michael to get Sydney out of both Amanda and Peter's hair.

[Hayley's Mansion]

Hayley realized how ridiculous his proposal was, so he gets down on one knee, looking even MORE ridiculous, and spews some gibberish about her being his one love, and asks her to become his partner in life. Once she gets a peek at the 3-carat ring, she says yes. Brooke and Billy look on, both sick to their stomachs. Now Billy knows what morning sickness is like, and he and Brooke race for the porcelain god.

[Wilshire Memorial Hospital]

Amanda drops by to pay Sydney half of what she sold the estate for -- fifty cents. Amanda suggests that Syd move in with Michael since that's what she wants anyway. And to help her on her way, Amanda plans to move Kimberly into Sydney's apartment. Amanda has a heart, though and gives Sydney until 6 pm to move out.

[D&D Advertising]

Hayley asks for Brooke's blessing. Brooke cannot accept the marriage, and tells her daddy that if she could she would have him committed. She even threatens to keep him from ever seeing the baby if he goes through with the wedding. None of this phases Hayley, however, and he leaves to get his fiancee and head for their wedding in Rosarito Beach, Mexico. Brooke wonders if this will put a kink into her plans regarding moving into the guest cottage.

[MP, Kimberly's New Apartment]

Peter drops her off. She loves her apartment. She is wearing her black box on her wrist. She must have crushed her hand again in order to slip it back on. Too bad, because she had set it perfectly and it was just starting to heal. Why she needed to put it back on her wrist in the first place is yet another question we'll never know. And why isn't it blinking? Is she cured? If so, then why does she still have it on? She thanks Peter for everything. He leaves and immediately beelines for Amanda's den. Kimberly sees him through her window as Amanda and Peter stroll hand-in-hand up her stairs. "Bastard."

[Rosarito Beach]

Alison and Hayley are in the church of a billion points of light. They exchange vows and then Juan Valdez finishes with, "and therefore, by the power vested in me by this church, I now pronounce you man and wife. What God has joined together, let no MAN break apart." This still leaves room for Brooke!

[Michael's Beachouse]

Syd stops by with Chinese food. She hints that she needs a place to stay since Amanda gave her the boot in order for Kimberly to move in. Michael says it wouldn't be a good idea and that he doesn't want her to make a mistake. So Syd says either let her move in or she'll go to the medical board. She tells Michael their days together were the "best days of her life." Yeah, like the time he tried to murder her on their honeymoon!

[To Be Continued...]

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Last Modified November 07, 1995