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Title: Found It!
Author: OXBastetXO
Category: Humor
Spoilers: None
Sequel/Season Info: Anytime
Rating: PG
Content Warning: None
Summary: When the Team loses something on a mission, they find a lot more than they can handle.
Showtime and MGM/UA owns Stargate: SG-1 and all there in. I'm just borrowing them for a bit, and I promise to give them right back when I'm done. Well, most of them, I might just keep Jack and Daniel for a bit longer.
Found It!
by
OXBastetXO
"Oh, for crying out loud!"
"Colonel?"
"Would you look at this!"
"What is it, Jack?"
"It's gone, sir."
"I can see that, Captain."
"What's gone...Oh, it's gone. That's not good is it?"
"Ya' think?"
"Well, it's not the end of the world, sir. I mean, we've done without it a couple times before."
"What about power, Sam?"
"We could always use the MALP....or not. That's gone too."
"Oh, for crying out loud! What is going on here?"
"Why is Colonel O'Neill upset?' What has happened? Oh, it is gone."
"Real observant bunch, aren't you?"
"It can't be too far, sir. I mean something like that just couldn't get up and walk away."
"Unless something really big got up and walked away with it."
"Thank you for those reassuring thoughts there, Danny boy."
"I mean, it's possible. The fact we haven't run into any large carnivorous animals on any of the planets we've been to doesn't mean there aren't any."
"Daniel could be right."
"Oh, that would be a bad thing, right?"
"Unless you like the idea of being a critter fritter. I would have to say, uh..yeah."
"Critter fritter?"
"I'll explain it when we get home, Teal'c"
"What was that?"
"What was what?"
"That!"
"What that?"
"That that!"
"Oh, for crying out loud, Daniel! What are you talking about? What that?"
"That , that crawling around in the bushes!"
"That would be me."
"Carter, what are you doing?"
"Looking for it, sir."
"Well, you could give us some warning next time. Daniel was going into hysterics, here."
"I was not."
"Yeah, Daniel. You just keep telling yourself that."
"I was not....you know it doesn't have to be carnivorous just because it is big. It could just be kleptomaniacal."
"Is that a word?"
"It might be, but I don't think it is an English one."
"It sounds like a Goa'uld word."
"Really? Meaning..."
"It is a most unpleasant epitaph involving one's mother and a mastadge."
"Daniel, you dog, and they say I have the salty vocabulary."
"Jack! kleptomaniacal is..."
"Daniel! Watch your mouth!"
"IT'S...I mean...what it means...that is.."
"You know, Colonel. Daniel is kind of cute when he starts to sputter and turn purple like that."
"SAM!"
"O'Neill, I believe I have found it."
"Where, Teal'c."
"Is this it?"
"What...Teal'c! Put that down! That's not it!"
"It is not?"
"NO!"
"Oh."
"Oh, for crying out loud! Who was supposed to be watching it?"
"I think Daniel was, sir."
"Me? I thought Teal'c was supposed to watch it."
"I thought O'Neill was to monitor it."
"Oh, you have got to be kidding!"
"Look, sir. We are never going to find it."
"I agree with, Sam."
"I am in accordance."
"I can't believe you guys. You are willing to give up so easily."
"Is this it?"
"Teal'c, you found it! Uh, Teal'c? What's holding on to it? Um...Jack...we need to go. NOW!"
"Sir, I think Daniel is right."
"Jackson get to the DHD and dial. Carter, you set those claymores up, right?"
"No, sir. You said we didn't need them."
"Well, I think Daniel's rover here want's to play fetch."
"Gate's open."
"RUN!"
"Rover?"
"Teal'c just get through the gate."