Skeleton Jokes

Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest? A: No body Q: What do skeletons say before they begin dining? A: Bone appetit ! Q: When does a skeleton laugh? A: When something tickles his funny bone. Q: Why didn't the skeleton dance at the Halloween party? A: It had no body to dance with. Q: What type of art do skeletons like? A: Skull tures Q: What did the skeleton say when his brother told a lie? A: You can't fool me, I can see right through you. Q: What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle? A: I'm bone to be wild! Q: Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party? A: He had no body to dance with. Q: What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day? A: Bone-bones in a heart shaped box. Q: Who was the most famous skeleton detective? A: Sherlock Bones. Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart Q: What instrument do skeletons play? .A: Trom-BONE. Q: What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!!! Q: When does a skeleton laugh? A: When something tickles his funny bone. Q: Why didn't the skeleton eat the cafeteria food? A: Because he didn't have the stomach for it! Q: Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? A: He didn't have the guts. Q: Why are skeletons usually so calm ? A: Nothing gets under their skin ! Q: Why do skeletons hate winter? A: Beacuse the cold goes right through them ! Q: Why are graveyards so noisy ? A: Beacause of all the coffin ! Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party ? A: He had no body to go with ! Q: What happened when the skeletons rode pogo sticks ? A: They had a rattling good time ! Q: Why did the skeleton go to hospital ? A: To have his ghoul stones removed ! Q: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain ? A: He could feel it in his bones ! Q: What's a skeleton's favourite musical instrument ? A: A trom-bone ! Q: How do skeletons call their friends ? A: On the telebone ! Q: What do you call a skeleton who won't get up in the mornings ? A: Lazy bones ! Q: What do boney people use to get into their homes ? A: Skeleton keys ! Q: What do you call a skeleton who acts in Westerns ? A: Skint Eastwood ! Q: What happened to the boat that sank in the sea full of piranha fish ? A: It came back with a skeleton crew ! Q: What do you call a skeleton snake ? A: A rattler ! Q: What is a skeletons like to drink milk ? A: Milk - it's so good for the bones ! Q: Why did the skeleton stay out in the snow all night ? A: He was a numbskull ! Q: What do you call a stupid skeleton ? A: Bonehead ! Q: What happened to the skeleton who stayed by the fire too long ? A: He became bone dry ! Q: What happened to the lazy skeleton ? A: He was bone idle ! Q: Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school ? A: He was boning up for his exams ! Q: What sort of soup do skeletons like ? A: One with plenty of body in it ! Q: Why did the skeleton run up a tree ? A: Because a dog was after his bones ! Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend ? A: I love every bone in your body ! Q: Why wasn't the naughty skeleton afraid of the police ? A: Because he knew they couldn't pin anything on him ! Q: How do skeletons get their mail ? A: By bony express ! Q: Why don't skeletons play music in church ? A: They have no organs ! Q: What kind of plate does a skeleton eat off ? A: Bone china ! Q: Why do skeletons hate winter ? A: Because the wind just goes straight through them ! Q: What's a skeleton's favourite pop group ? A: Boney M ! Q: What do you do if you see a skeleton running across a road ? A: Jump out of your skin and join him ! Q: What did the old skeleton complain of ? A: Aching bones ! Q: What is a skeleton ? A: Somebody on a diet who forgot to say "when" ! Q: What happened to the skeleton that was attacked by a dog ? A: He ran off with some bones and didn't leave him with a leg to stand on ! Q: Why are skeletons so calm ? A: Because nothing gets under their skin ! Q: What do you call a skeleton that is always telling lies ? A: A boney phoney ! Q: Why didn't the skeleton want to play football ? A: Because his heart wasn't in it ! Q: What happened to the skeleton who went to a party ? A: All the others used him as a coat rack ! Q: What do you call a skeleton who presses the door bell ? A: A dead ringer ! Q: When does a skeleton laugh? A: When something tickles his funny bone. Q: How did skeletons send their letters in the old days? A: By bony express! Q: How do you make a skeleton laugh? A: Tickle his funny bone!