Bill W. and Dr. Bob S., co-founders of Alcoholics Anonymous, developed an easily understood program that provides spiritual direction for managing and coping with life. Their process of recovery is centered around the Twelve Steps, which they developed to improve the quality of their lives and to spread the message to other alcoholics. Unlike other self-help programs, the Twelve Steps represent a spiritual discipline that does not depend on self-reliance, determination and human resources. The twelve-step program, as used by Alcoholics Anonymous, maps a course toward spirituality and faith, and offers a guideline for achieving peace and serenity in one's life.

For adults with ADD, The Twelve Steps help us make a much-needed change in the management of our lives. They connect us to wisdom, power, love, and order through belief in a Power greater than ourselves. We allow God, who created order and harmony in nature and the universe, to bring order and sanity to our lives. Many of us exhaust ourselves trying to manage our ADD, control the unpleasant symptoms, feel good about ourselves, and survive in a world made for more "normal" people. In many cases, our control and "self-will-run-riot" mentality created new and more troubling problems such as addictions, co-dependency, poor health, depression, fear and anger.

The foundation for ADD Anonymous is the twelve-step process. This process has helped countless millions of individuals recover from many forms of addictive, compulsive or obsessive behavior. It brings together the tested wisdom and the proven effectiveness of the Twelve Steps. The process encourages self-understanding and emphasizes the importance of relying upon a Power greater than ourselves.

1. We admitted we were powerless over ADD--that our lives had become unmanageable.

At some point, there comes a moment of clarity when we recognize that our ADD symptoms are interfering with the quality of our lives. In spite of our attempts to control our lives, we finally see that our lives are not working. We admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our lives.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

We stop seeing God as someone who judges us for our behavior. By admitting that we are powerless, we receive a small seed of faith that enables us to believe in a Power greater than ourselves. We see how relying on our own power is not working, and that believing is gift we receive, not something we accomplish.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.

We put our belief into action and admit our need for a new pilot. We assess our needs, abilities and potential, and contemplate the required changes. We turn the controls over to God and trust that we will achieve serenity and success, and begin to experience life as others do.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

We take an inventory of our lives and make a list of our common traits and positive qualities. We look at our relationships and identify our resentments and fears. We become aware of our low self-esteem and our inappropriate behaviors. We also find the compassion, creativity, and courage that we have because of ADD.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

In Step Five we share our inventory with God, ourselves, and another human being. This isn't easy for adults with ADD, because our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors have become a part of who we are. To share our inventory with another person can be embarrassing and painful. If we don't hold back the more shameful experiences, the relief we feel can have a powerful effect on us, and gave us a sense of freedom.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

For most of our lives we relied on our character defects, using them as tools to help us survive with ADD. The more willing we are to face our dilemma, the more easily we will remember the pain and wounds that our fear, manipulation, resentment, and addictions caused us. Ultimately, we become entirely ready for God's help in removing some of our inappropriate and harmful behavior.

7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.

We use prayer as a way to humble ourselves and ask God to remove our shortcomings-- one defect at a time. This is the time we talk seriously to our Higher Power in a very personal way about our inventory. In Step Seven we learn to draw nearer to God, knowing that God can help us focus on our positive traits.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

We see how our ADD survival tools hurt others, and recognize some of the harm we caused. We make a list of those we have harmed and prepare to make amends for our past wrongs. It is important to put ourselves on the list and look at the damage done to our self-esteem, our career, and our physical well being.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

We review the list we made in Step Eight list, and make personal or indirect contact with those on our list. Some situations will require a face-to-face meeting, and other situations will be handled by a change in our behavior. Making personal amends to ourselves is a vitally important part of Step Nine.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and, when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

Step Ten is a daily summary of Steps Four through Nine--a review of our thoughts, feelings, and actions. We admit what we find and ask our Higher Power for help in altering our behavior. In areas where we have harmed ourselves or others, we make the necessary amends.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.

Although prayer and meditation can be difficult for adults with ADD, they are key elements in maintaining peace and serenity. They offer a way to stay balanced and to rely on our Higher Power. A pause to say "God, I need a clue," is sufficient, because God understands who we are and accepts us unconditionally.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Through working The Twelve Steps and surrendering to the process, we achieve a spiritual awakening that comes from abandoning self-will and embracing God's will. We carry our message to others by sharing our own experience, strength, and hope with them. We apply these principles to every part of our lives.

A vital component of recovery is being part of the twelve-step community. People in twelve-step programs can relate to our pain and hear what we are saying without judging us or trying to try to fix us. We, in turn, can hear their stories and offer support. In twelve-step meetings, people come together to share their experience, strength, and hope with others like themselves. In these meetings we find out that many others share our symptoms, frustrations, and characteristics. We develop a better understanding of ourselves and a better relationship with others. The main focus is reliance upon a Higher Power to guide and direct us.

For adults with ADD, attending meetings can provide structure. The "rules" usually require that a person listens to the speaker, does not interrupt, and waits patiently for his or her turn. For someone with ADD, this means not speaking out of turn, sitting still, and paying attention. In a subtle way, this paves the way for the behavior modification that adults with ADD so desperately want and need.

Also valuable in the twelve-step community is support and encouragement from a sponsor. A sponsor is someone who has experience in working the Twelve Steps, understands its principles, and can help newcomers get a good start. When starting the journey, it is extremely valuable to find someone whom we can relate to, and with whom we feel safe enough to share our innermost thoughts and feelings. Experience suggests that it is more helpful for men to sponsor men, and women to sponsor women.

A sponsor does not offer advice--a sponsor shares his or her experience, strength, and hope. A sponsor is someone to call or meet whenever we need help or encouragement; someone who will be there anytime, anywhere. We can learn a lot from a sponsor by simply listening to the wisdom he or she has gained from the Twelve Steps, the guidance of a Higher Power, and the support of others in recovery. A good sponsor can help us to think about what we are doing and encourage us to use the tools of the program to find answers. But sponsors do not perform magic, resolve difficulties, make decisions for us or accept responsibility for what we do. A sponsor understands the priority that recovery has to have in our life, and may strongly suggest that we attend meetings regularly, study twelve-step program materials, ask questions when necessary, and be willing to work the Steps as far as we are able.

Because using the Twelve Steps as a way to manage life with ADD is a new practice, it may be difficult to find a sponsor who is familiar enough with the Steps as they apply to ADD. If this happens, one can choose a recovery partner. A recovery partner is usually a peer--someone on our own level who can serve as a fellow traveler on the journey. A recovery partner can provide mutual accountability and support in the same way that a sponsor can, even though he or she may lack a strong background in the Steps. A recovery partner, like a sponsor, needs to be available whenever we need help. Similar to a sponsor or a recovery partner is a professional coach. Having a coach is not a part of the twelve-step process, but it can be an effective tool for treatment.

Many adults with ADD have behaviors that, although related to ADD, need to be dealt within different ways. If we were accustomed to self-medicating and have problems with addictive behaviors as a result of this, support is available in other twelve step programs. We may be addicted to alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, or sex; or we may be codependent or an adult child of an alcoholic. If so, help is available in twelve-step groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-Anon, Narcotics Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous, or Co-dependents Anonymous and Adult Children of Alcoholics. These groups can address particular needs and provide the support needed to gain freedom from these problems.


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