Used to be that a bad wind came from your Uncle Al after a Thanksgiving dinner. In an effort to provide a public service to the denizens of the net, we offer the free services of our patented weather advisory computer. Introducing the latest in Meteorological Technology! the  Weather Related Disaster Prediction Thingamabob Please make your selections from the pull-down menus below to enable the GIZMOTRON 2000's Disaster Prediction Probability Program. Select the closest region to you North America South America United Kingdom Northern Europe Former Soviet Union Asia South Pacific The Isle of Figi Parts of Maine West 43rd St. South Central Australia Pittsburgh Select your dwelling type Single Family Home Condo Apartment Complex Mobile Home Tent Cave Under the overpass at 3rd and Pine Dumpster Automobile Soon to be Ex-girlfriend's House The Y.M.C.A. The Betty Ford Clinic Are You: male female Do You: Engage in Outdoor Activities? Plan on Remodeling Soon? Have an Outdoor Wedding coming up? Go BOTH ways? (just checking...) Enjoy nude sunbathing? See Elvis often? Believe in the Easter Bunny? Enter Your Shoe Size That's all the information the Gizmotron2000 needs. Click Submit to er...well...submit the information or reset to do it all over again. The Gizmotron2000 will tabulate the results and give you the most likely source of the weather related disaster El Nino will inflict upon you.