It's Time for Rattie Songs!

(Sung to the tune of "Summer Nights" from Grease)

Dinner lovin' had me a blast
Dinner munchin' happened so fast
I got a bowl from Mum just for me
Full of food, sweet as can be
Breakfast tray driftin' away to uh-oh those dinner nights

<wella wella wella>
Tell me more, tell me more, did you get many peas?
Tell me more, tell me more, did you have to say please?

She came to me, she gave me the food
I bruxed at her in a ravenous mood
Delicious smells wafted up my nose
I dove right in, because that's how it goes
Dinner fun, something's begun, yeah uh-oh those dinner nights

<wella wella wella>
Tell me more, tell me more, was it that tofu sludge?
Tell me more, tell me more, did you share some with Fudge?

Grabbed a green pea, discarded the shell
Sweet potato and pumpkin as well
Dug down deep to find what was nice
Chickpeas, corn, chicken and rice
Dinner fling, I'll eat anything on uh-oh those dinner nights

<wella wella wella>
Tell me more, tell me more, was it creamed corn and ham?
Tell me more, tell me more, did you stash all you can?

Dragged the pasta to my nest box
Stashed the lentils in somebody's socks
Threw the carrot in the litter tray
Flung the apple and lab blocks away
Hate the taste, but I'll keep just in case, on uh-oh those dinner nights

<wella wella wella>
Tell me more, tell me more, did you over-exert?
Tell me more, tell me more, was there icecream dessert?

The bowl got empty, that's where it ends
So I crawled into a hammock with friends
There I lazed, my belly in bliss
I wonder when breakfast time is...

Breakfast tray, and treats in the day
But uh-oh those dinner niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiights!!!!

[Copyright  Robyn Frankland <robyna@bigpond.net.au>]

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With apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan for their (much parodied)
song "Modern Major-General" from the musical The Pirates of
Penzance.

<Dapper, sharp in an immaculate naval uniform, stands at
attention and sings pompously>

I am the very model of a modern R. norvegicus
I'm small and cute and sweet and furry, clever, smart and devious
I'm not well known for discipline or highly skilled at being tame
But happily come running for treats when my owners call my name.

I live on peas and yogurt drops and all the other foods I crave
I have my owners wrapped around my little finger like a slave
I'm always getting cuddled, massaged, played with, cooed at,
scritched and kissed
Because I'm just too cute and charming for my owners to resist

<All ratlist ratties>
Because he's just too cute and charming for his owners to resist.

I have a nest box to sleep in to wile away the bright of day
A hammock, ladders, ropes and tubes and other stuff for me to play
And yet I'm always finding new ways to escape this cage of fun
So that I can explore the outside world and freely sneak and run.

I gnaw on walls and furniture and shred the carpet 'til it's gone
I stash anything not tied down that I can get my paws upon.
I pee on all the furniture, on bedspreads, laps and where I lurk
Even though my owners don't appreciate my handiwork

<All RatList ratties>
Even though his owners don't appreciate his handiwork.

I know the difference between treats and food laced with the drug Baytril
And when my owners bath me I know how to squeak and not stay still
I'm really good at hiding out when it's time to go home instead
Especially when my owners are tired and want to go to bed.

I groom all day and night to keep my coat so shiny, thick and clean
I hone my claws to needlepoint so I can scale my owners skin
I have to constantly groom eyebrow, nose, teeth, callouses and ear
'Cos when it comes to cleanliness, my owners just have no idea.

<All RatList ratties>
'Cos when it comes to cleanliness, his owners just have no idea.

I may not know how to meow, or chase the cars along the street
Or swim around a bowl, or fly up in the air and squawk and tweet
But still in matters cute and sweet and clever, smart and devious
I am the very model of a modern R. norvegicus

<All RatList ratties>
But still in matters cute and sweet and clever, smart and devious
He is the very model of a modern R. norvegicus.

<Dapper waddles off humming to himself>

[Copyright  Robyn Frankland <robyna@bigpond.net.au>]

(Back to Jojo's Birthday Party)
 
 

With apologies to Rodgers and Hammerstein's song
from The Sound of Music.

<Dapper, in a sweet happy voice, sings:>

Cream cheese on fingers and Cheerio crunching
Warm winter hammocks and yogurt drop munching
Pinata pea packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favourite things

Grooming the Fudge rat and scratching my itches
Sleeping all day, getting head rubs and scritches
The dinner time food bowl and all that it brings
These are a few of my favourite things

When Myco bites, when the meds sting
When I'm feeling sad
My mum gives me some of my favourite things
and then I don't feel so bad

Stashing of phone bills and gnawing on cables
Shredding new t-shirts and chewing off labels
Climbing on Mum's hand to pee on her rings
These are a few of my favourite things

Pouncing on cagemates and impromptu napping
Biting of socked toes and soya milk lapping
Play time out of the cage to spread my wings
These are a few of my favourite things

When the Fudge steals my macca nut
When I'm feeling sad
My mum gives me some of my favourite things
and then I don't feeeeeeeeeeel soooo baaaaaaaaaaaad...

<Dapper dances and spins around the stage, grabbing and eating
all the treats his adoring female fans have flung at him>

[Copyright  Robyn Frankland <robyna@bigpond.net.au>]

(Back to Jojo's Birthday Party)
 
 

With apologies to Paul Williams and Ken Ascher for the lovely
song "The Rainbow Connection", that Kermit The Frog sings in
The Muppet Movie.

<Fudge lazes contentedly in his favourite hammock, head leaning
ponderously on a macadamia nut. In a tiny little nervous voice
he starts to sing:>

Why is it so many people hate ratties?
And why don't they want us to live?
Ratties are dirty and plague-ridden vermin
And ratties have nothing to give.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, pet ratty acceptance
My owner, my cagemate and me.

Who said that pets should be dogs, cats or fishes?
Or parrots or <shudder> reptiles?
Someone who's not known the love of a rodent
Or heard of their most charming wiles.
What's so amazing that makes one choose ratties?
And why don't more pet people see?
Someday we'll find it, pet ratty acceptance
My owner, my cagemate and me.

All of us under the spell
we know that it has to be Rattus...

Have you been half asleep and have you heard bruxing?
My cagemate does this endlessly.
Is this the sweet sound that calls to rat lovers?
The voice of contentment and glee
If others could hear this would it open their minds?
Would they perhaps choose a ratty?
Someday we'll find it, pet ratty acceptance
Our owners, all ratties and me.

La la la la la la laaaa
La la la la la la laaaaaa...

<Fudge drops off to sleep with a dreamy expression on his
furry little face>

[Copyright  Robyn Frankland <robyna@bigpond.net.au>]

(Back to Jojo's Birthday Party)
 

(Sung to the tune of the Monkees song)

I thought rats were just for kids or transients,
fine for classroom pets, but not for me.
Ah, beady eyes and snake tails;
that's the way they seemed.
Never touched one in my wildest dreams.

CHORUS:
    Then I saw his face.
    Now I'm a believer.
    Sweet fuzzy cheeks, and wiggly nose.
    I'm in love!
    I'm a believer,
    I'm a rat-keeper and my love grows.

I bought him a cage, some food, and rattie toys,
read all that I could, and joined some clubs.
Got him a companion--
then a couple more--
Now I'm the proud mom of 64.

(CHORUS)

Ah, give them lots of kisses,
yogurt drops and peas.
Keep them off of pine so they don't sneeze.

(CHORUS)
 

(Back to Jojo's Birthday Party)
 

This is a part song.  Divide into two groups (or use two different funny voices, if
you're alone) and sing where the music tells your part to sing.  On the second time
through, sing "Whale did" instead of "Who did".  You can even adapt the words to fit
your own rattie's name, if you like!

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