IN THE MIRROR
By Susan Smallwood and Susan Griffith

Part 14

Once again Lucy walked down the beach, the frothy breakers showing signs of a storm to come. Now in her forties, her dress no longer sweeping the ground, she was still a striking woman. Her strides were brisk and confident and she barely paused at Anna's piling, now

darkened for the years. She was almost at the front gate of Gull Cottage, when a car drove up the road and Anna, now a lovely girl of 23, stood in the front seat and waved.

"Mummy!"

"Hello, Anna!" Lucy waved her handkerchief, and walked straight into her daughter's arms, noticing the well-dressed young man who had stepped out of the car also. "Anna, darling! This IS a surprise! How did you get off from the university?"

"They don't know I'm away." Anna turned to the young man, and gestured him near. "Come on, Bill. Don't be shy. This is Bill, Mummy."

They shook hands, and Anna chattered on, ignoring her mother's dazed expression. "His real name is Sir Evelyn Anthony Peregrine Scaithe, so of course he's called Bill."

"Of course." Carolyn said dryly.

"And we're thinking of getting engaged."

Lucy looked at her daughter in shock. "Anna!"

"Well, I haven't even asked her yet," Bill chuckled, "but if she keeps on presenting us, I suppose I'll have to."

Anna took Bill and her mother's arm and dragged them into the house. "We've come for your blessing, Mummy. And we haven't had tea."

"Anna - you quite take my breath away."

"Darling, you just make yourself at home in there," Anna gently pushed Bill towards the living room, "and we'll help Martha with the tea."

Bill grinned. "Well, if I'm not wanted -"

Standing on tiptoe, Anna kissed his cheek, "We'll sing out when we want you. Come on, Mummy!" She pulled Lucy towards the kitchen.

"There'll be two more for tea Martha," Lucy announced, sitting down at the table.

"Miss Anna!" Martha hugged her.

"And you'll find a strange young man in the living room."

"Who?"

Rushing to Lucy, Anna grabbed her hand. "Well - what do you think?"

"Gracious!" Lucy said, breathlessly. "You haven't given me time to think. I gather his name is Sir Evelyn Scaithe, and you want to marry him."

"SIR Evelyn!" Martha exclaimed.

"I met him at a dance in London. He's a sub-lieutenant in the Navy - you know my weakness for sailormen."

"SAILORMEN?" the Captain queried. Carolyn glared him into silence.

"It's the first I've heard of it." Lucy said, weakly.

"Oh, it's a lifelong vice."

"And what do you want me to say?"

Martha picked up the tea tray, and started out. "Doesn't matter what you say. SHE'LL 'ave her way, just like her mother."

Anna grinned, "Don't you go making eyes at him, now!"

"And 'im a lieutenant?" Martha scoffed. "Captains is more in my line!" she announced as she walked out.

"I KNEW I liked this Martha!" the Captain grinned in satisfaction.

Carolyn just shook her head.

Anna laughed, but turned with sudden emotion to Lucy. "Oh, I've never been so happy in all my life!"

Lucy smiled, satisfied. "Then I'm happy, too, and I shan't waste time with questions."

"I knew you wouldn't. And wait till you hear! I've discussed it with Bill, and you're to come and live with us - you and Martha."

"Oh no, darling."

"But you must!" Anna looked at her gently. "You've been alone so much of your life."

"You're very kind - but it's hard to explain. You can be much more alone with other people than you are by yourself - even if it's people you love. That sounds all mixed up, doesn't it?"

"No, not a bit. But if you ever change your mind - "

Lucy stood at the window, looking out, her expression peaceful. "Get a plate, darling." She paused. "No - I won't change my mind. I love this house, and I've been very happy here, and I shall live here till I die."

"With Captain Gregg?" Anna asked, busy with the cups and plates.

Lucy gasped and turned pale, "W - what did you say?"

"With the ghost of Captain Gregg."

"Anna! What ARE you talking about?"

"Ha! The children are always knowledgeable!" The Captain exclaimed.

Anna smiled softly as she cut slices of cake, "Oh, I knew the Captain very well. When I was a little girl, the first year we lived here. We used to have the most wonderful talks."

"You didn't!" Lucy's voice was strained.

"It was all a game I made up, of course. A sort of dream game. But it was very real while it lasted."

Lucy shut her eyes briefly, and smiled, only vaguely listening to Anna.

"Then he stopped coming, suddenly. I suppose I was growing too old and sophisticated for him. But I grieved and grieved. I was hopelessly in love with him."

Turning, slowly, Lucy looked up at her daughter.

"Heavens!" Anna gasped. "You look as though you'd seen a - don't tell me you saw him, too?"

Lucy collected herself. "No. Not for years."

"Then you DID? Oh, Mummy! You don't suppose he really haunted us?"

"No, darling." Lucy smiled sadly. "Things like that can't happen. It was only a dream."

"The same dream - for both of us?"

"Perhaps I set you off by telling you about my dreams. Little girls are very impressionable."

"I don't remember your telling me." Sitting Lucy down, Anna looked at her, bright eyed. "Tell me now! I'd love to hear about them."

"I - I can't remember them very well." Lucy said, slowly, a shadow passing over her face. "Just bits and pieces - a phrase here and there - a look. And I think I dreamed most of my book. 'Blood and Swash'. I MUST have - I never could have thought of it. All these years I've tried to remember - and I can't."

Anna looked at her shrewdly. "Do you know what I think? I think you fell in love with him, too!"

"I did nothing of the sort!"

"I wouldn't blame you if you had. When did you stop seeing him?"

"I do believe Anna has the right of it." the Captain said.

"Of course she does! Obviously Lucy fell in love with the Captain! Who wouldn't, when he ..." Carolyn stopped suddenly. "Oh, watch

the show!"

Once again, Lucy's face had softened, and a dreamlike expression took over. "After about a year. I dreamed we quarrelled. It was about a man."

"Uncle Neddy." Anna said, quietly.

"Anna! Did you know that Miles and I -"

"I used to pray you wouldn't marry him."

"You were so right. I met him - five years ago - at a dinner party. He was bald and fat, and he drank too much, and then he cried. It seems his wife finally had enough and took the children away. You never can tell, can you? Once I thought I wanted to spend the rest of

my life with him."

The Captain laughed aloud. "THAT I can see!"

"Perhaps he did exist - the Captain. Perhaps he DID come back and talk to us. Wouldn't it be wonderful if he had? Then you'd have something - you know what I mean - to look back on - with happiness."

Lucy smiled. "No, darling. He never existed. We made him up, you and I. I just wasn't intended to have that kind of happiness. And I haven't missed it, really, I haven't. Oh, I've been lonely at times, but there've been compensations. You, and now Bill. And dear Martha

- we sit and chatter like a pair of parrots. And this house, and the sea, and the gulls. And memories. I have those you know," her voice was soft, "even if it WAS a dream."

"How sad." Carolyn sighed. "But it's beautiful."

"Hmm. It might have been a lot more beautiful had they not landed up on the rocks years ago!" was the Captain's retort. "Not that any sort of relationship would have been possible, of course!"

Suddenly getting hold of herself, Lucy put a hand on Anna's shoulder. "Now, let's join your young man and we'll have tea." Together, they went out of the kitchen.

"Well, I must say," the Captain said, after a moment of silence, "I rather think that she has managed to recover and become Lucia again. I confess to liking her this way."

"So do I." Carolyn smiled. "She has put that wretched business with Miles behind her, and even though the Captain made her think he

was merely a dream, she still has her memories, and she makes it enough."

"I daresay you would do the same, were you in Lucia's position." the Captain tugged his ear thoughtfully. "I have not seen you held down for long, no matter the provocation."

"I would hope I could," Carolyn nodded. She chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully. "She never knew that Anna also saw the Captain.

Jonathan told me the first day that you were there."

"And Anna suspected Lucia's love for the Captain." the Captain said, not looking at Carolyn. "Once Lucia thought it was a dream, she

dismissed her emotions for him as if they had never existed. Yet Anna had the right of it, all along." He glanced up suddenly, and their eyes caught and held.

Carolyn tried hard to think of something to say, but nothing came to mind. Nothing except how magnificent Captain Gregg was, and what

a vivid blue his eyes were, and that nothing could ever make her forget her profound love for him. Only when the movie returned did she gather the strength to tear her gaze away from his, in order to

watch the end of the show.

Lucy stood upon the balcony, the dark night, and thick, swirling fog hiding the white hair and wrinkles that had settled upon her. She was now in her seventies. The low moan of a fog horn pierced through

the fog, and she squinted in the darkness, trying to find the lost ship.

Inside, Martha came into the bedroom with a tray. Spotting Lucy, she put it down and went to the door. "You come in 'ere!"

There was a faraway look on Lucy's face as she came in, and the door was slammed behind her by Martha. "What were you doing out there?"

"I - don't know." Lucy answered, hesitantly.

"Well, you know what the doctor said."

"Oh, bother the doctor! He's an old woman.

"You're not a young one, anymore." Martha said, flatly.

"She still has spirit! Good for Lucia!" the Captain grinned. "And Martha is just as quick with the repartee as always!"

"But the Captain STILL has not come back. He just ... just ABANDONED her! He must have thought she was going to be with Miles, and never stayed around to check. Oh, that is terrible!" Carolyn moaned.

Lucy picked up a letter from her desk and smiled. "There's a letter from Anna. Little Lucy's engaged."

"Little Lucy!"

"To the captain of a trans - Atlantic plane. Anna's very happy about it. Says it must run in the family."

"Aeroplanes?" Martha snorted. "Not in MY family, they don't."

"I suppose she means captains." Lucy chuckled.

Carolyn smiled at that one, too. The Captain merely grunted.

"Drink your 'ot milk, now." Martha offered her the glass.

Wearily, Lucy settled into her chair, pushing the glass away. "Not now, Martha. I'm too tired. And I have a funny pain in my arm."

"No wonder, standing out in the night air. Come on, drink it up."

"Stop bossing me!" Lucy said, sharply. "I don't want any hot milk."

"Now, now. Don't get into a state."

"I'm not in a state! I just want to be left alone. Everyone bossing me -"

Martha looked down at her, a little wounded. "Very well. Though bossing I never intended, and I only brought the milk for yer own good." Taking the empty tray, she left.

Lucy heaved a sigh, "I AM tired." Her eyes glanced over at the glass of milk and, with a small smile, she reached for it and took a sip. Too weak to hold up the glass, she rested her arm against the chair arm. Suddenly, the hand went limp, and the glass fell to the floor and shattered.

"She died!" Carolyn exclaimed, then held her breath as the voice of Captain Gregg was heard once again.

"And now, you'll never be tired again."

"He came for her! Oh, I'm so happy!" Carolyn's face glowed ... and her eyes glimmered with tears again.

The Captain glanced at her, and an indulgent smile crossed his face before he looked back at the television and afforded her some privacy.

"Come, Lucia." the Captain said, tenderly. Then, smiling down at her, he held out his hands. "Come, m'dear."

The hands that were placed in his were young and beautiful, and as Captain Gregg helped her to her feet, so, too, was Lucy. Her eyes glowed with joy and love, and, for a moment, they stood together, before walking towards the door. Lucy paused, one last time, to look back at the room, the lifeless old woman in the chair, the portrait of Captain Gregg on the wall. Turning from that, she looked at the Captain, and they walked down the stairs hand in hand, his eyes never leaving her.

At the foot of the stairs they met Martha, and Lucy held out her hand and called to her, only to have Martha pass her by, unable to hear her. Lucy turned to the Captain in surprise, but he smiled and shook his head, slightly. She understood, and took her place at his side. Gently he slipped his arm through hers, and led her to

the door, which swung open, revealing the passage to heaven. They descended down the foggy path and the door slowly closed behind them. As the climax of the music faded away, there was silence in the room. Carolyn was trying hard not to cry. It was such a beautiful and satisfying ending!

The Captain looked at her for a long moment, then finally spoke, "I do think that was a fitting conclusion to their story."

Carolyn nodded mutely. She agreed totally. Lucy lived her life fully, and if a rather lonely life, she now had the promise of eternity with someone who loved her dearly and whom she loved. Carolyn realized that her own story might be similar, should the Captain ever leave Gull Cottage the way the Captain did in the movie.

She would go the rest of her life alone, with her memories if need be, rather than leave Schooner Bay, or try to put anyone else in his place. But it would be so much happier and fuller if she could continue to share what she and the Captain had now, however limited a relationship it might be.

"I must admit to being glad, overall, that I saw this movie with you, my dear." the Captain spoke again.

Smiling crookedly, Carolyn again realized that he had not once called her Madam or Mrs. Muir since her outburst earlier in the evening. Now if she could only get him to call her by her first name! Still, his 'my dear', spoken in his husky voice, sent shivers of delight down her spine. And he hadn't invited her to call him Daniel,

so she supposed she must stick with the more formal 'Captain' she was wont to use.

"I do wonder, however, how he could bear to leave Lucia for all those years. Such a lovely woman, with that cloud of dark hair ..."

"Perhaps she reminds you of Vanessa?" Carolyn tried to speak carelessly, but her hand reached up of its own volition to finger her short blond hair.

The Captain raised his eyebrows. "Vanessa's dark tresses obviously still bother you after all these years!" he grinned.

Carolyn's eyes smoldered. "And I suppose YOU don't get jealous?"

"Of whom? A dandy in ice cream britches?" the Captain laughed. "Or perhaps a most unprofessional doctor? Or a sea-sick swain? A

publishing self-fancying Romeo?"

"A husband and father..." the words popped out of Carolyn's mouth before she thought.

The Captain stiffened, and pain flashed in his eyes.

"I'm ... I'm sorry, Captain," she began, but he turned away.

"Needless bickering." he muttered, then vanished.

"Captain! Captain, please, wait ..." but Carolyn's voice merely echoed in the empty room. She drooped, and leaned her head against the sofa back. "What have I said? How could I? Whatever the provocation, how COULD I?"

Suddenly she straightened. He wouldn't leave now, would he? Not forever ... not like the movie? She ran up the stairs and into the

bedroom. There was no sign of him. A quick check out the French doors showed an empty balcony. Carolyn blinked back unwanted

tears, and ran up to the attic. She burst into the room without ceremony. "Captain!"

The room was empty.

Whirling, Carolyn ran for the stairs to the widow's walk. He HAD to be there. She emerged into the February night. The wind was up

and sleet stung her face. "Captain! Captain Gregg! PLEASE, come back! Captain!"

The sound of her voice was lost in the rising gale and the thunder of the waves on the shore. Carolyn gripped the railing and fought the

dark fear that was creeping over her. "Captain Gregg! Don't you DARE presume to act like that ghost on the movie tonight! Come here and face me! I have a choice in this, too! It's my life, and you have no right to make arbitrary decisions that involve me! Captain! Where

are you? Blast it, Captain, show yourself!"

Her emotion too strong even for tears, Carolyn closed her eyes and willed the pain away. She barely felt the wind whipping her wet

dressing gown against her legs. With trembling lips, she whispered, "Daniel, please. I'm so sorry I said what I did. I love you. Don't leave me alone again."

Incredibly the storm seemed to lessen somewhat, and she opened her eyes. There stood the Captain, his blue eyes shining down at her.

"Daniel..." her voice was the merest whisper, and her hand went out to him, disbelief written all over her expressive face.

He took her hand in his. Although she felt nothing solid, she DID notice the tingling and saw the aura of his hand surrounding hers as it had earlier. Then he bent and his lips touched her hand, sending electric sparks shooting up her arm. He straightened, his eyes never leaving hers. "I love you, too, my Carolyn. I could never leave you. I obviously have not the strength of will that my namesake did. Nor the arrogance to believe that I can make such decisions for you. You are right, it IS your life. All I ask is that I can share it as much as possible. I trust you have no objections, Cara?"

"Cara?" Carolyn questioned.

"Dear. Lucy was renamed Lucia by her Captain because he felt rightly that Lucy was too spineless a name for someone with her fire and spunk. I shall rename you Cara so that I may call you "dear" all the time, a special name just between us -- as a Valentine present!" His gaze ran down her shivering, wet body. "And now, Cara, before you catch your death of cold, I think it wise that you go below deck. It is late. Ah, in fact, it is Valentine's Day. The best Valentine's Day I have ever had."

"And ... you won't make me think this is a dream? Will I remember this in the morning?" Carolyn dared to ask, not moving away, leaving

her hand still enclosed in his.

"Forever, Cara, my love. Forever." this time he bent closer, and she was warmed by a faint touch as of butterfly wings on her lips.