"In Good Shape"

 
Carolyn came into the kitchen for breakfast, helping herself to a cup of coffee before sitting at the table. "Morning, Martha!" she said, cheerily. "Not much for me today, please, I'm off to Schooner Bay for 9:00 a.m." Then she made a face.   "I've been talked into attending the fitness classes at the community centre."

"Fitness classes?" Martha looked surprised. "Since when?"

"Oh, Mrs. Post phoned me yesterday. It seems the PTA is backing Mrs. Helmore in her wish to organize the women for fitness. I think she used to teach it in England. Anyway, the classes are starting today, and I agreed to go."

"A fitness class?" Now looking dazed, Martha shook her head. "To each her own..."

"YOU are going to attend a fitness class, madam?" the Captain appeared suddenly beside Carolyn.

"Well, yes." Carolyn murmured, shooting a look at Martha and hoping she wouldn't hear.

"Forgive me, Madam, for taking the liberty, but I hardly think you are in need of any such thing!" the Captain raised his eyebrows, looking at the slim, beautiful woman before him. "Now, if it were that fiddle-footed housekeeper of yours..."

Carolyn frowned at him, knowing Martha couldn't hear him anyway, but not liking the disdain she heard in the Captain's voice. In the year and a half the Muirs had lived at Gull Cottage, it seemed that the Captain had never adjusted to Martha. Perhaps because she was so insistent on cleaning out the house, as well as tending to be rather disparaging when speaking of Gull Cottage.

"So," Martha said, putting Carolyn's toast in front of her. "What does one wear to a fitness class?"

"Sweat pants, I assume." Carolyn shrugged. "Probably some of the ladies will have leotards, but I don't."

The Captain surveyed her curiously. "A leotard, Madam?"

"I have a hard time envisaging Mrs. Post in a leotard..." Martha's introspective tone was too much for Carolyn, who exploded in very unladylike laughter at the image which presented itself to her mind.

Wiping her eyes, and finally getting herself under control, Carolyn said, "Oh, Martha, I do hope she DOESN'T have one, or I'll be laughing all through the class!"

"Perhaps if one was diamond-encrusted," Martha grinned. "she MIGHT wear it. But definitely with no males in sight!"

"Definitely not!"

"Sounds rather intriguing." the Captain observed. "I do believe I should attend this class with you."

"It's for ladies only." Carolyn said quickly.

Martha nodded. "I assumed THAT, Mrs. Muir."

"You may consider me your invisible chaperone again." the Captain was firm. "A fitness class? I can't wait..."

"You can't come!" Carolyn spoke quickly.

Looking surprised, Martha said, "Actually, I hadn't planned on it, Mrs. Muir ..."

"Sorry, Martha." blushing faintly, Carolyn shot a narrowed look at the Captain. "I didn't mean it that way. Of course YOU can come ... if you are interested."

"Frankly, seeing a group of women exercising isn't my idea of a fun time ... let alone having to DO the exercising!" Martha shook her head emphatically.

"My dear, if you only had more than a primitive mortal brain," the Captain teased Carolyn gently, "you could hold up your end of both conversations."

"Will you stop?" Carolyn demanded lightly. She tried to make it sound as if she were referring to Martha's words about the fitness class, not the Captain's.

That infuriating man merely chuckled. "I really must continue my education ... and find out what a leotard is."

Carolyn rolled her eyes, but said nothing. She ate her toast, finished another cup of coffee, then ran upstairs to change. As she entered the bedroom, the Captain turned from the telescope, eying her up and down critically.  "What is it?" she asked immediately, looking down at herself. "Did I spill my coffee?"

"No, my dear. I was merely trying to imagine a leotard ... what is it exactly, pray tell?"

Carolyn swung to her dresser so she wouldn't have to face him, keeping her head down as she rummaged through her drawer. "It's a skimpy, low-cut handkerchief, like my bathing suit, often worn with skin-tight leggings and baggy socks. Sometimes it's sleeveless, sometimes it has short or long sleeves."

"And you go out in public in that?" the Captain sounded horror-struck.

Carolyn bit back a smile and said gravely, "Well, to a fitness class. And, as I said, they're usually gender-divided. So this is a ladies-only class. And I do not have a leotard. I'll be wearing sweat pants."

"Sweat pants?" his voice registered distaste. "They sound very unladylike..."

Finally unearthing her pants, Carolyn pulled them out of the drawer, still not looking at the Captain. "Maybe so, but they're comfortable enough for fitness..."

"I still think I will come." he announced.

"Captain!" she swung around and glared at him. "Believe me, it's not likely something that will interest you!"

"That remains to be seen, don't you think?" and he disappeared.

"Ooh, aggravating, impossible ma...GHOST!" she muttered, as she hurriedly changed. "Primitive mortal brain indeed!!"

Twenty minutes later, as she pulled up at the Community Centre, Carolyn fervently hoped the Captain had changed his mind about accompanying her. She was not particularly thrilled with the idea of attending the class anyway, let alone with someone like the Captain observing!

Walking in the door, she greeted the other ladies who were standing around. Mrs. Post was making a list and taking the dollar entry fee. Carolyn bit the inside of her lip as she saw that the other woman was wearing a fashion designer sweatsuit. Sure enough, though, a couple of the younger women had leotards on.

"I must say, Madam, I cannot fathom why you would not have a leotard, if that is what I am seeing..." The Captain's voice sounded right next to her, and Carolyn started imperceptibly.

"Will you get lost?!" she hissed. Another woman looked curiously at her, and Carolyn smiled uncertainly in her direction.

"Mrs. Muir?"

"Yes, I'm Carolyn Muir." Carolyn introduced herself.

"I'm Veronica Helmore." the woman smiled. "I've heard so much about you. Although more, of course, about your daughter, Candy."

"Yes, Candy spoke of Mark a fair bit too." Carolyn nodded.

"So we are forgiven for the black eye Mark gave Candy?"

Carolyn laughed. "From what Candy said, it was a fair fight. And she got a lot of mileage out of it by wearing the black patch!"

"THIS is the woman who raised a son who cannot tell the difference between a boy and a girl?" the Captain was astounded. "How can you even speak with her, Madam?" He moved up beside Carolyn, peering at Mrs. Helmore's hot pink leotard. "I must say, I don't care for this colour. You should get one in a bright red. You would look ..."

"I don't WANT a leotard!" Carolyn almost snapped, interrupting him.

Mrs. Helmore was taken aback. "You don't need one. What you are wearing is fine..."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."

Then Mrs. Vogel approached. "Oh, don't mind Mrs. Muir, Mrs. Helmore. She's a writer, you know. Rather eccentric..." and she smiled.

Carolyn almost winced more than smiled, and stepped back as Mrs. Vogel gushed over the fact that a "stranger to our community would be willing to come forward and lead the masses of women to good health."

"Masses being the right word, in some instances, Madam. Tell me again why are you here?" The Captain spoke in Carolyn's ear.

"I'm starting to wonder..." Carolyn murmured quietly enough that no one else heard.

"Ladies! Ladies, let us begin." Mrs. Post was clapping her hands and calling for everyone's attention.

Looking around, Carolyn counted 15 women in the room. A few looked eager, most looked almost trapped. Probably Mrs. Post had railroaded them into this the way she had with Carolyn. Oh well, Carolyn HAD gained a little weight since coming to Schooner Bay, and maybe she wasn't getting as much exercise now that she was typing more ... She also wasn't going on as many walks with the Captain. Missing that, Carolyn wondered briefly what had happened, and WHY. Then she brought her attention back to Mrs. Helmore who was demonstrating some stretches.

Everyone attempted to follow the moves, some more gracefully than others. As she swayed from side to side, trying to hold in her stomach as instructed, Carolyn tried to ignore the Captain who walked about the room, commenting on the various women and their expertise in following orders.

"Confound it, Madam!" he said, at last. "You all look like a flock of dying albatrosses!!" the Captain imitated the arm movements, and Carolyn had to fight to stifle her giggles at the look on his face.  "For the life of me, I cannot imagine why you felt the need to come here! It's a complete waste of your time!"

"Get OUT!" she muttered, glaring at him.

Mrs. Helmore next had them lie flat on the floor, pressing the small of their backs into the wood and tilting their pelvis.

"Mrs. Muir, this is almost obscene!" the Captain strode around. "If any men came in, it would be SCANDALOUS for them to see you all like this! Now I can think of many other SOFTER places where seeing you in a position like this would be very pleasant ... but in PRIVATE! In fact, I can see you in that red leotard..."

Carolyn had no idea what had put him in such a teasing, protective mood, which, she supposed, just confirmed her primitive mortal brain and aggravated him more than ever! She closed her eyes briefly, hoping he would just give up and go away, but knowing she would never be so fortunate! She could refuse to look at him, but unfortunately, she continued to hear him. Feeling the laughter building up inside her as he continued his caustic comments about the women at the fitness class, she strove to ignore him. If she made it through this one class, she would never be back, Carolyn vowed. Not if the Captain insisted on attending again.

"I should think holding in the laughter would be good for your stomach muscles, Madam!"

Looking up, Carolyn saw the Captain crouching beside her, his head cocked to one side, a teasing twinkle in his eyes. Her mouth twitched in a smile in response, and her eyes danced.

"This is VERY good for me! Excellent exercise!" she nodded. Many of the other women around grunted in agreement.

"I see you finally have the knack of speaking in two conversations at once!" grinned the Captain.

"I'm afraid it's something I'm not entirely sure I want to do too often, though." Carolyn said.  There was a chorus of accord from others.

"You mean you're NOT going to buy a red leotard, Madam?"

Mrs. Helmore had them get up and touch their toes twenty times. Carolyn felt the Captain's interested stare as she obediently bent and stretched with the others. At the count of twenty, she self-consciously tugged down the hem of her top which had ridden up above her waist. No wonder they had separate classes for men and women. It could be most embarrassing! She was glad the exercising would account for the redness in her face.

At last the hour was over. Carolyn swiped at the strands of blonde hair wisping across her cheeks, and smiled weakly at Mrs. Helmore.  "It was certainly a good workout."

"So you'll be back?" the other woman looked eager.

Carolyn's eyes strayed to the Captain who was looking thunderous.  "Well, we'll see." she prevaricated. "It depends whether or not I get busy with an assignment ... I've been known to miss meals and sleep, so I'm afraid I can't commit myself to attending fitness regularly."

"But..." Mrs. Helmore began.

"Oh, I know, fitness is important ... but if I don't write, we don't eat. Hmm, then I would be dieting anyway..." Carolyn pretended to be thinking about it.

"Madam, you most certainly do NOT need to diet! You are in excellent shape, which is more than can be said about these others." the Captain growled. Then he continued in a softer tone, "And if you need exercise, there's a whole beach out in front   of Gull Cottage just begging to be explored! I would be honoured to go with you any time, if you need the company!"

Carolyn's smile lit up her face. "Thank you for today, anyway," she said gently to Mrs. Helmore. "I will think about coming sometime, but not yet."

Going out to the car, Carolyn got in the driver's seat, then looked over at the Captain who had appeared in the passenger seat. "Well, did you get an education this morning?"

"Indeed I did, Madam!" His voice dropped to an intimate level, "but may I say that after seeing you with those other women, I am more convinced than ever that you are in good shape and have no need of such blatant foolishness as attending classes in movement!!!"

"Thank you, Captain." Carolyn said, lightly, starting the car and pulling out on to the street.

"But still..." he added, almost as if to himself, "I WOULD enjoy seeing you in a red leotard!"

Carolyn had a sudden vision of herself in the position he had said earlier he would like to see her: in the red leotard, lying on the bed in the master bedroom at Gull Cottage, pelvis tilted in a very provocative position, the Captain bending over her. She almost drove off the road. The Captain roared with laughter as she swung the wheel around, and her face burned.

"I can only guess where your thoughts led you, Madam, but I assure you, I expect mine were the same place!!" he spoke wickedly.

Refusing to look at him, Carolyn clenched her hands around the wheel and said nothing.

"In OUR room?" the Captain added slyly.

"Captain!" They were now almost at Gull Cottage, on the deserted part of the road by the cliffs to the beach. Carolyn slammed on the brakes and pulled the car to the side of the road, stopping it. "This is not the time to be talking like that ... I could drive over the cliffs and kill us both!" she glared at him.

Then her words sank in, and her sense of the ridiculous kicked in. She leaned towards the Captain, her eyes softening. "Captain, you knew many women, didn't you?" she cooed.

"Hmm." he was non-committal, suddenly not sure of himself in this situation.

"Many were chasing you, weren't they?" Carolyn shifted closer, her eyes limpid green pools.

"I hardly think..."

"I'll bet none of them tried to seduce you in the front seat of a car, did they?" her voice wrapped seductively around him as she edged closer yet.

Drawing back into the corner, the Captain swallowed. Carolyn hid her triumph at finally having got back at him. "Just think, if I drove us off the cliffs, I would be able to reach out my hand and touch you ..." she twisted from behind the steering wheel and her left hand reached out to his face.

"Mrs. Muir!" Finally the Captain found his voice, but his roar came out slightly strangled.

She drew back only slightly, and pouted. "I can't have a vision MY way? It has to be yours? Red leotard on your bed?" At the look on his face, Carolyn could contain herself no longer. She broke into peals of laughter, sinking back in her seat. By the time she pulled herself together, the Captain had disappeared, no doubt very glad to escape the company of a lunatic. Still chuckling, Carolyn started the car again and carefully drove the rest of the way to Gull Cottage.  She was sure she would hear no more about red leotards ... ever!

Martha met her at the door as Carolyn came up the walk of Gull Cottage. "Well? I'm all ears, Mrs. Muir. How was the class?"

"I had a good workout, anyway." Carolyn grinned. "But I think I've managed to get myself out of going back. I hope so, anyway."

"If you WERE going back, you should probably splurge for a leotard."

"Now don't YOU start!" Carolyn turned on Martha with a sudden fierceness that startled both of them.