Ask Ms.
Dee
This column is devoted
to answering the questions of our youth.
Please submit your questions/letters
to:
Ms.
Dee
MichiganBulletinOnline
or
c/o The Michigan Bulletin
P.O. 24084
Lansing, MI 48909
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Saying no and meaning it
Dear Students:
Drugs and drug dealers are still trying to take advantage of all of you who give them your time and attention. It is not enough to just say “NO”, you have to be able to mean it and walk away. You cannot give these people any of your time. This goes for anyone trying to steer you in the wrong direction. You cannot spent time, have conversation, or show interest in anything that has to do with drugs and drug use.
Please take note:
- Do not participate or take part in any drug activity.
- Do not take or try any "free" samples.
- Do not leave any of your food or drink unattended.
- Do not eat or drink anything you are unsure of.
- Avoid being coaxed into any activity or behavior that is questionable.
- Do not let friends pressure you in any way.
It is very important that your parents/guardians are always aware of what you are doing and where you are going. This is for your own protection. You should stand firm on what you believe. Peer pressure might come, but you don’t have to give in. This isn’t always easy to do, but if you learn to stand up for what you know is right, it would be harder for you fall for anything that's wrong.
Sincerely,
Ms. Dee
Ask Ms. DeeArchive Articles
Computer Literate?
Dear High School Students:
Are you going to be computer literate in the next century?
Hopefully you will be. The age of increased technology is upon us and those of you who are not learning the basic computer language will be at risk to engage in minimal employment or none at all.
Quess what? Computers are here to stay, and it is imperative that you high school students make sure that learning how to operate a computer is on your list of classes to take. If there are no computer classes listed, please consult with a school counselor, parent(s) or guardian to see what can be done. Whether you plan to attend college or not, you will need to be able to operate a computer. Most jobs require some technical knowledge such as: cashier, salesperson, waitress, and the work areas, home appliances, musical instruments are becoming more and more sophisticated as we sleep.
Unfortunately, African-Americans are not at the top of this industry in terms of owning high tech companies as a whole. We are all having to learn a different kind of language, and if we don’t learn it, we will be out of the mix. As a student, the door of opportunity is wide open and you can consider a future in the highest form of technology. I’m not just talking about being a Computer Specialist, but owning the company. The sky is the limit!
Choose today to review your future subjects for next term. If computer classes are available at your school, your in luck, however, if they are not perhaps there is a way you can enroll in a beginner class this summer. If your family is lucky enough to afford a computer for home use, or you have access to a computer through family friends, make it your business to browse through the computer textbooks on your own. Use your spare time wisely. You may be able to learn to do minimal tasks by just following instructions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Many of you have learned how to play computer games and this is a step up from that to knowledge that you can use. The Public Library is full of all kinds of computer textbooks, and many libraries have computers that are at your disposal to look up information.
Lastly, the community center in your neighborhood might have computers available for you to learn and practice on. Also in these institutions there are always people available to help you. Remember, “Where there is a will, there is always a way to learn”.
Sincerely,
Ms. Dee.
Previous Ask Ms. Dee columns
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....in search of black history
Dear Ms. Dee,
Q. Since seeing the movie Amistad, I am eager to learn more about African-American history. How can I find out more about my people? - J.S.
Dear J.S.,
First of all donÕt be shy about asking for information. There are plenty of books at the public library and at bookstores. Our books have become popular and all authors are not known. So sometimes books by and about African-Americans are set aside in an area so that they can be seen easier. This is not a put down, but rather a tool for helping you to find the books that you want. With February being Black History Month, literature should be plentiful and easy to find. Bookstores may go out of their way to Òstock upÓ, because more of us are reading. You can take the initiative to browse, and become better acquainted with all types of literature.
Also as you read popular magazines, learn to look for the sections on the latest books that are available, and look for the author's names. These are helpful because they usually have a synopsis written about each book. In this way, you can acquire information about new books. Then you can take the information to the library or bookstore. As you get more excited about reading what African-Americans have written about our history, fiction, people, poetry, etc., you will find that there are more books available than ever before. In addition, the internet adds a powerful 24 hour, seven day a week source of information and interaction sites with other people who share the same interest.
You no longer have to rely on anyone else to give you knowledge. You can read it for yourself. If you are utilizing the public library, be sure to consult the staff librarian to direct you to the proper sections where many of these books are located. As you grow older, you may want to eventually set up your own personal library so that many of these books will be at your disposal. You can never have too much knowledge. Happy reading!
Sincerely, Ms. Dee
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New year's resolutions
Dear Ms. Dee,
I would like to make a New Year's resolution, but I need some ideas for things I can strive for because I don't want to fail.
Please help me. - A. J.
Dear A. J.,
The new year offers new beginnings for all of us and if we are wise we will make our New Year's Resolutions as obtainable as possible. Making unrealistic resolutions place a strain on you and can make you feel defeated before you can even start. On the other hand, you should challenge yourself by creating a list of goals that are short ranged that can possibly be rewarded by your parents/guardians or other supportive adults.
Here are some of the things you can aim for:
1. Striving for perfect attendance can bring rewards from school and home.
2. Better grades (whatever better means to you). Example: You may not be an A student, but realistically you could become a B student or raise your grades from D's to C's.
3. Keeping your room clean for a specified period of time without being told might reap a reward.
4. Keeping up your appearance--neat, clean clothes, good hygiene, groomed hair, etc.
5. Doing household chores without being told might mean extra privileges. Example: More time with friends, extra allowance, more freedom, use of the family car, etc.
The benefit of making resolutions can make you a better person if you are true to yourself and true to the commitment. To be the best that you can be is always worth achieving. How you use what God has given you can mean the difference between success and failure. Just remember success is always better. God is there to help you if you ask Him.
Striving to be Student of the Week, maintaining a higher grade point average, and being recognized for exceptional skills can be rewarded with certificates, scholarships, or money. The aim here is to start by writing down a list of things that you think you can do. Begin the New Year by working on them. Having a good attitude is very important, and can mean the difference between success and failure. Above all, just know in your heart that you can do it!
Sincerely, Ms. Dee
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The real meaning of Christmas
Dear Young Readers,
As we get ready for the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ for all
of us, who believe, remember the real meaning of Christmas. Exchanging and
receiving gifts has become a tradition that most of us adhere to. Even though
gifts are wonderful, please donÕt forget those people who are less
fortunate than yourself.
Please help or call an elderly family member, just to say hello, help a disability person, etc. If someone you know is ill, maybe you can lend a helping hand. Do something extra for someone.
Also take time to help out more at home, keep on top of your homework assignments while you are off during the holidays, try to do things without being told, and above all, be grateful for all that is done for you.
For those of you that get an allowance, or have a part time job, be sure to bless those you love with a special gift of appreciation, friendship and love. It doesnÕt matter how expensive the gift if it comes from your heart. If money is not available, take time to make a card or craft a gift. The point here is to remember them and above all do not forget the reason for the season. Please show love and appreciation.
I pray that God will bless and keep you and your families safe during this Christmas holiday.
Peace and love, Ms. Dee
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Date or Wait?
Dear Ms. Dee,
I am 16 years old and would like to date. My parents say I cannot date until I am 18 years old. I really like a boy at school and I want to see him anyway. I donít want to sneak and date him, but what can I do? - S. J.
Dear S. J.
Being sixteen is really a time of self discovery, and your parents want you
to spend as much time as possible discovering who you are. As you develop
into a young woman, they probably call themselves protecting you as long
as possible. They may feel that you might become too seriously involved if
you exclusively date one boy.
As the rate of teen pregnancy rises, many parents are becoming more strict regarding teenage dating. Waiting until you are 18 years old gives you a chance to have a more mature attitude. Also, legally you become an adult, and hopefully you will be finished with high school. Then you will be readying yourself for college where you will meet many young men.
Serious dating can result in giving your life a drastic turn especially if you become pregnant. Young girls may find that it is difficult to say no to sex when the young man persists. Your parents may feel that this is a stressor that you donít need.
This may not be what you wanted to hear, but with so many negatives out there to influence you, such as the explicit sex in the media, the availability of drugs, peer pressure, etc. Your parents may feel just trying to get you graduated from high school is enough pressure.
Please do not consider disobeying your parentís wishes. Generally when this happens, the consequences are not pleasant. Besides, it will be difficult for your parents to trust you in the future. Sneaking around never pays off.
Having respect for yourself is important. No young man, nor young woman can claim respect if the relationship is built on dishonesty and deception. In other words, thereís no right way to do something thatís wrong. Being a teenager isnít easy, but you can have a rewarding life if you try and understand your parentís point of view, and seek creative things to do with your friends in groups. Teenage years can be fun and rewarding if you concentrate on the goodness of life.
Sincerely,
Ms. Dee
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Bad Attitude, grades equals no Christmas
Dear Ms. Dee,
My mother says she is not going to give me anything for Christmas because she doesnít like my attitude and school grades. I am 14 years-old and sometimes I want to spend time with my friends or talk to them on the phone. I am having trouble with my homework and a couple of the classes I just donít like. I try to keep a good attitude, but it is really hard to keep her happy. I want to have a nice Christmas, so how can I get her to change her mind? - B.K.
Dear B.K.,
I cannot guarantee that your mother will change her mind, but if you can do the things she wants you to do in a timely manner, she might be more giving at Christmas.
If your school grades are low, you may want to ask your teachers for help. Of course, this is easier said than done because every teacher isnít always available to give extra help. However, if you are behind in school assignments, then youíre going to have to ask for help anyway. You didnít say which classes you are struggling with, but I know two teachers who tutor students, and Iíll let you know how you can get in touch with them.
At this time, I hope and pray that your mother will take a moment to listen to you. Please try and explain your situation to her, by letting her know how much Christmas means to you, and that from this day forward you will be working on doing your best in school. Be honest with her if you really donít understand the subjects that are giving you trouble. If you think you need a tutor, ask her if it is possible for you to have one.
Perhaps you havenít thought of this, but she might be upset with the fact that you havenít been much help to her regarding chores. Only you know the answer to this. If you can do the things she asks with a pleasant attitude, she may give you another chance. I know this isnít easy, but I hope you will try. Most parents want their children to be happy, especially at Christmas time. It is no fun for a parent to punish their child on this important day. Itís much easier to be loving and giving.
I pray that you're able to improve so that this Christmas can be your best holiday ever!
Sincerely, Ms. Dee