Airdate: December 7, 1968
Writers: Peggy Elliot and Ed Scharlach
Director: John Erman
Guest Cast: Dabbs Greer* as Norrie Coolidge
Kenneth Mars as Ellsworth Gordon
George Morgan as the assistant editor
Bill McLean as the waiter
*Dabbs Greer, who portrayed the proprietor of "The Lobster House," would later go on to portray a proprietor of a more "heavenly house" as Reverend Alden in "Little House on The Prairie."
Synopsis:
Gull Cottage's antiquated plumbing is on the outs again and Carolyn needs to write a really hot story in order to pay for the repairs. Unfortunately, she's fresh out of ideas. The Captain suggests they collaborate on a story and dictates a steamy story about a female stowaway. Carolyn thinks the story would sound better if it were written from a feminine point of view and tones down the tale much to the Captain's chagrin. After finishing the manuscript, Carolyn takes it downstairs and leaves it unattended on the hall table while she collects some dirty laundry to take to the Laundromat. Taking advantage of Carolyn's absence, the Captain spirits the manuscript back upstairs and proceeds to make some "minor" changes to the story.
The editor of "The Feminine View," Ellsworth Gordon (Kenneth Mars) is crazy about Carolyn's story, "Maiden Voyage" and is very anxious to meet Mrs. Muir in person once he discovers that she's quite a looker. While in town purchasing several copies of "Feminine View" containing her manuscript, Carolyn runs into Norrie Coolidge (Dabbs Greer), proprietor of "The Lobster House" who offers to buy her a "Shore Dinner" to celebrate. After Carolyn refuses, Norrie runs inside "The Lobster House" and tells everyone to come see "the writer lady." Claymore Gregg tries to defend Mrs. Muir's reputation, saying that she's a "lady of culture and refinement." He changes his tune, however, after reading Carolyn's story and agrees that she is indeed a "wild woman!"
Ellsworth phones Carolyn and tells her that he'd like for them to get together in order to discuss the possibility of her writing more stories featuring the same characters. Too busy to read her own story, Carolyn rushes upstairs to pick out a suitable dress to wear for her meeting with the editor. While upstairs, Carolyn receives another odd phone call from a mysterious caller who murmurs the words, "va-va-va-voom" and hangs up. Claymore arrives bearing a box of candy, a bouquet of flowers and a sudden desire to share a "bird and a bottle" with Carolyn. Carolyn is much too busy preparing for the arrival of her editor to chat and after he va-va-va-vanishes, she wonders if he's the person who's behind the strange phone calls.
Ellsworth arrives at Gull Cottage and is quite pleased to see that Carolyn is as good looking in person as he was led to believe. After Carolyn admits that "Maiden Voyage" was based upon her own personal experiences, the lecherous editor puts the moves on the attractive widow. When her back is against the wall (literally) the Captain comes to Carolyn's rescue and defends her honor with a swish of his sword. After Ellsworth leaves, Carolyn accuses the Captain of tampering with her story and ruining her reputation. The Captain assures Carolyn that he merely wanted to make her story more authentic and that nothing "as trivial as this could sully her reputation."
Ellsworth later phones and apologizes but Carolyn tells him that future collaborations with her "ghostwriter" would be impossible because he died!
Rating: 4 bells
Favorite Moments:
The most romantic moment was when a sword-swashing Captain Gregg rescued Carolyn from the clutches of the lecherous editor, Ellsworth Gordon.
Favorite quotes:
(Captain Gregg to Carolyn about the effects of her steamy story): "Believe me, madam. Nothing as trivial as this could sully your reputation."
(Claymore to Carolyn after failing to secure a date): "I'll call you later, baby! Va-va-va-voom!
Least favorite whatever:
The ending. I think it would have made for a much zippier ending had Claymore returned to Gull Cottage to once again try to "get it on" with Mrs. Muir instead of the featured "my ghostwriter died" scenario. It would have been quite funny to see the Captain effectively put Claymore in his place! Also, I think "A Feminine View," would have been a much better title for this particular episode.
Contributed by Caroline Kent