Posted March 31, 2003
I thought of you today but that is nothing new, I thought of you yesterday and days before that too,
I think of you in silence, I also speak your name, And all I have now is memories and your picture in a frame.
Your memory is my keepsake with which I will never part, I have you in my heart.
A million tears I have cried,if love alone could save you, you never would've died.
In life I loved you dearly, In death I love you still,
In my heart you hold a place no one could ever fill. It broke my heart to lose you but you didn't go alone,
For a part of me went with you that day He called you home.
(author unknown)
Tomorrow at approx 9:45 it will be ten years since I lost my hero. I found this poem, which says how I feel about Alan and how much I miss him still. I will be busy tomorrow, so decided to post this tonight while I have the time. Those of you new to the sport , who never got to see Alan race or get to know him, really missed out on seeing a very unique guy. He will always be in my heart and memories. RIP, Alan
Beth Hayes
Posted April 1, 2003
10 years and it seems like it was just yesterday when we got the awful news. I still cry when I look at his picture. I am so thankful for the time God shared him with us. There will never be another Alan! He did it his way and for that we are eternally grateful.
Karen
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You will always be in our hearts forever, I will never forget you telling me "Linda I did it my way", those were the last words I heard you speak, I will treasure them forever. You will always be on my mind and in my heart. God Speed Alan
Linda Brady
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Ten years...and everything in my life has changed, but I can never forget Alan. Bristol was going to be my first NWC race to go to that year, and I still feel cheated that he didn't make it there that Thursday night. But I know he is with Our Savior, and we will all be together one day. God speed, Underbird.
akprov31
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I am only 16 years old so I didn't see much of Alan racing but to this day I watch racing classics on ESPN and I only wish I could have been watching racing and was really into it when I was that young; he was an awesome race car driver and I can say that because I saw him in the racing classics. I honestly wish he could still be with us today racing with the other 43 drivers and showing them how its done... wish I could see him race..everyone will miss him...
Bryan
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I have been a race fan for over 50 years here in Wisconsin....I watched a young man race at Slinger and then move on to ASA...One Sunday in 1984, I was watching (sort of) a Winston Cup race when I heard his name mentioned.
I couldn't believe my ears...there he was, racing with the big boys. Well, I was hooked!
I watched every race, went to some, met him in Pocono and with out a doubt, considered myself to be his biggest fan. I rooted for him every Sunday.....sad with him, glad with him.
1992 was a crowning point of the whole thing and I was on top of the world along with him.
April 1, 1993, left my empty, and I have had an emptiness ever since. I still watch the races, but as far as I am concerned, Stock Car racing died on April 1, 1993. All we have left is big sponsorship and for the most part "IROC" racings every Sunday.
The Thunderbird was the last rear wheel drive, V-8 powered car you could buy at a dealership and what we are watching now.....well, it isn't the same.
I miss you Al,......You died and you took my sport with you. It will never be replaced.
God, I miss you!
Jerry Duchow
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It is almost 7:30 here in Phoenix. I didn't think I would end up feeling so sad today, but I do. I noticed something special about Alan in '87'. All through the 1988 season I watched every minute of every race I could watch and he became my total focus. Of course Nov. 6, was the absolute best day of my life! It was like a fairytale day.I had waited for the race here at Phoenix all summer and it was soooo perfect!!!! I was able to congratulate him in the garage area and he even put his arm around my shoulder! I got his autograph that weekend and every year after that. Back then, we would wait by his hauler after the race outside the fence and sure enough, after awhile, he would always come over. I was able to talk to him several times in the next 4 years.
I live 12 miles from PIR and I go to all the races. I can always feel him there, how he would glide through turn 4, how his car always seemed a little quieter than everyone else's. I could always see him in the garage area, working on his car.... And I can still gaze out over the race track and see him turning that car around, doing the Polish Victory lap....
Sally Rector
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Alan was a great driver but more importantly he was a great role model for anyone with a dream. Long live his memories with anyone that ever reached for a star and grabbed it.
Ben Paul
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I'll never forget...
Today I celebrated my birthday. 10 years ago today my birthday took on a totally different signifigance. Alan Kulwicki was and still is an inspiration for how I live my life. A good work ethic and an education will get you far in life.
I hold dear the Christmas cards that Alan personlly sent out to members of his fan club through the late 80's and early 90's. To those of us who still remember Alan fondly live your life to the fullest. This would be the best way to honor the fallen CHAMPION!!
Sincerely
Ron
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I was paging through all the messages left here. Came across some I remember from previous years. Came across some of mine I left in previous years. It still hurts. And we will never forget you, Alan. Never.
Debra Caserotti
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Thank you AK...
Alan is one of the greatest inspirations to anyone in all walks of life.
He taught us that by simply believing in yourself, & putting your mind to something, you can accomplish everything. Alan will always be remembered.
Godspeed AK
Eric Riedmann
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10 years...so much has happened in the sport. Alan's contributions continue on. Tonight my husband and I spent time reading the stories on NASCAR.com. It is heartwarming to see that he still lives through the lives of those that worked for him and how much he touched them. Our NASCAR room is a tribute to Alan dotted with other drivers. We have our favorites, but none as dear as Alan was to us. He is remembered today in our hearts as he is everyday. We will continue to honor his memory by proudly displaying the AK FAN license plate in California!
Johnna
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Looking back on the ten years since we lost Alan, I find myself just as devastated today as I was then. I truly have never experienced a greater loss (both of my parents are still living).
Alan became a part of my life 16 years ago. I was going through some extremely painful and traumatic experiences in my life. A firefighter friend of mine realized that I needed something in my life to distract me. He suggested NASCAR as that was a particular hobby of his. At first I thought, who wants to watch a bunch of cars go around and around. I finally relented and sat down to watch a race with Steve. He explained many of the intricacies of the sport and I found myself instantly hooked (does that sound familiar?). Of course, the next step was to pick a driver. Being that Steve was a diehard Chevy fan, and me being a woman, I had to go in the opposite direction. I actually had a dream that told me to pick Alan Kulwicki, plus I liked the name.
The next six years turned out to be the best of my life. Steve moved on but I'm eternally grateful to him for turning me on to racing. I started attending races and watching all on TV. I recorded almost all of the races (I have several hundred video tapes). When at the tracks, I camped by myself in my little tent. I met the greatest group of folks at the tracks, many of whom remain dear friends. Several people with large expensive motor homes took me under their wings. And they all marveled at my dedication to Alan Kulwicki. Through many people, I was able to get pit passes for many races. I took gazillions of photos (one of which Alan liked enough to ask me to get him copies, I did and wonder what ever happened to them). I spent many, many hours watching Alan and the pit crew working. I never bothered them and they seemed to appreciate that. Many times, some of the crew, especially Peter Jellen and Danny Cameron, took a few minutes to chat with me. Sometimes Alan himself would say hello. He got so that he recognized me. That, small as it is, was a big deal to me. I toured the shop several times and enjoyed watching the goings on through the windows. When I would get to talk to Alan at the shop, at public appearances, etc. I was always astounded by his wonderfully dry sense of humor. I think that many people mistakenly thought he had no sense of humor because they couldn't understand it.
Through these years, although not an official part of what was happening, I felt to myself like I was because a driver needs staunch fans. Alan knew he had no more dedicated a fan. When he won the Championship, I was unbelievably exstatic. I was getting congratulatory phone calls from race friends from Texas to Canada. You would have thought that I won the championship. I felt like I had. I had the biggest bunch of balloons that I could afford sent to Alan's shop, where I'm sure it got lost among the thousands of others. That was okay.
The banquet was simply the most moving event I have seen. Thank God I taped it. The emotion felt and shown by Alan was true and heartfelt. His tribute to his crew was very apropos and, I'm sure, appreciated by the men and women who worked so hard for him.
To complete my rambling thoughts, 1993 looked to be another good year. Alan's season didn't start off gangbusters, but was steady. I was able to go to Darlington and be satisfied with a nice sixth place finish. I remember Alan saying he was disappointed with sixth, but there would be next week. I would give anything if there could have been. My computer is going nuts. I saw, like many people, the news of the plane crash on TV. My world came apart. Emotional devastation was all I felt. I have never cried so hard in my life. This was worse than the bad things that had brought me to AK Racing in the first place. The same friends who called after Alan won the championship were now calling condolences. I knew I had to attend the memorial service at St. Thomas Acquinas in Charlotte. I left home at the very wee hours of the morning and drove from Richmond, VA to the Church. I was one of the very first people to get there. Myself and three young ladies who had known Alan from living in his former apartment complex were the first in line. It turns out that only six of us without invitations were allowed in the Church. The service was beautiful, somber, funny and touching all at once. It made me realize that my tears were selfishly for myself as Alan was now in a better place. After the service, Peter Jellen spotted me and invited me to a brunch at the race shop. As I was leaving to go there, the first song that came on my radio was Eric Clapton's "Tears in Heaven". I took my extensive collection of photos of Alan and the crew and the guys seemed to like seeing them. It was a nice gathering of people who had respected Alan and the things that he had accomplished. Alan's death left a large void in me and I wasn't sure how to deal with it. I immediately ordered new license plates, going from Go Alan 7 to Missu AK (which I still have on my car). I followed other drivers on the circuit but no one could ever be the same. Danny Cameron introduced me to Johnny Benson, who I had been watching do well in ASA. Johnny was very nice and is my driver now, till death us do part. But it will never be the same. I can't allow myself to get that attached. I won't ever give up watching racing, that wouldn't be what Alan would do, but a bit of the sparkle has worn off. Last but not least, my friends know how nutty I am about racing as I got two registered Siamese cats: their names are Alan Kulwicki of Ninemark and Jonni Benson of Ninemark. I would love to hear from other fans of Alan. Thank you.
Beth Bloomquest
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It would be interesting to see all of the Alan Kulwicki vanity license plates that people have. At the time of his death, I switched from GO ALAN7 to MISSU AK which I still have on my car.
Beth Bloomquest
Posted April 11, 2003
I think of you every day Alan and especiallly on raceday. I watch the "young guns" and compare them to the senior drivers...the elite group, the creme of the crop. Bill, Rusty, Terry, Mark etc. are still racing their hearts out, as you would be. And like them, you would still be among the best there ever was.
Jane
Posted April 27, 2003
People becom heros and an inspiration to others. AK was an inspiration and still is to many many people. Over time we forget many of the small things that happen and we hold dear some memories.
Alan became and is a role model. I wish we had more like him. Someone who started with nothing or very little and made it happen.
I met Alan more than once..., but that is another story.
Gary
Posted July 16, 2003
Every day I wonder why your death has had such a terrible strong-hold on me. I never had a chance to meet you.... There is no way to explain the sudden tears and inabilty to swallow all of a sudden... I think about you every day. Why???? I cannot look at the pictures of your hauler driving around the bristol track...some pictures are just too hard to take. Love you and miss you teribly still. til then, KP
Karen Peters