www.WhoNeedsPants.com
Proudly Presents....
63,000 +
People have been to this page... And about 6 billion
other people haven't...
Update:
Hey, what's up? Long time no update...but I suppose that's because this page
more or less runs on its own and does need my stinkin' help.
In any case, the number of hits to this website continues to grow, and I suppose
that just means that it KICKS ASS (Kit Sass?). So yes, that's all. Feel free
to visit my new personal web page as www.whoneedspants.com .
Type In Your Name: |
 |
Keep sending those names in! The more I get, the better this page is. And, oh yeah, if the name is Hugh, Mike, or Harry.....Ehhh....I don't want it! I see no difference between Harry Sack, Harry Balz, and Harry Balzac! Dammit, they're the same thing!! Also check out my new music site, featuring original music by me and my brother! Click the banner below to go....
This site was mentioned in an article by CNN. Go HERE to see the article.
And also...If you've ever wondered what it's like being a messed-up teenager in the 90's, check out my personal web page....Click HERE to go to Greg Bauer's Beg For Attention.
Keep Sending names to me at.... CranKings@aol.com
- This is my other site. The site you're
at now is really just sort of a subsite for my CranKings
Prank Call page. So after you've gone and read all the names with double-meanings,
go to my CranKings Prank
Call page. Cool? 
- The
home of the greatest songs ever written....Well, maybe not exactly. But if you've
ever wondered what you get out of the minds of two teenage musical...geniouses...then
this is the place to go. An eclectic blend melodic trauma, straight from the
heart to you......Ok, I'll admit it, these songs are mostly about monkey's and
hair gel!
About this Page:
I believe it was a 300 lb. motor biker who once asked...
"What's in a name? Rawhide by another other would still smell as sweet."
And although I wouldn't argue face to face with this biker, I would still like to say that I have discovered that there IS a lot more to a name than you may think (And also, that rawhide smells strikingly similar to stale Pop-Tarts).
This page is dedicated to every "Ben Dover" and "Seymor Butts" on Earth. For they have endured great pain and taunting from all over the world (But mostly from me) simply for possesing a name that should be looked upon with prestige and honor. This page is basically a list of all sorts of names with double meanings. I'm constantly looking for new names to put up, so send me any suggestions you might have!
But Be Warned!!!
Some of these names contain sexually suggestive material, which may not be suitable for young children, old men in tank tops, and certain breeds of stuffed animals.
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My Guestbook View
My Guestbook 
Here's the banner for this page if you want to trade links and/or banners. So, just grab this banner, or save this link, then tell me your site and I'll put up a link to your page. Cool, thanks.
I have alphebetically alphabetized the names according to letters of the alphabet .... So just click on the letter of the name you'd like to go directly to, or just go down the entire list. The choice is yours.....
Barb Dwyer (Barbed Wire)
Barb E. Cue (Barbecue)
Barry D'Alive (Buried Alive)
Barry D. Hatchett (Bury the Hatchett)
Barry Shmelly (Very Smelly)
Bart Ender (Bartender)
Bea O'Problem (B.O. Problem)
Bea Sting (Bee Sting)
Beau Vine (Bovine)
Ben Crobbery (Bank Robbery)
Ben Dover (Bend Over)
Ben O'Drill (Benadryl)
Ben Thair (Been There) See- "Don
Thatt (Done That)"
Ben Lyon (Been lieing) I
saw this one in the phone book!
Bess Twishes (Best Wishes)
Betty Bangzer (Bet He Bangs Her)
Betty Beatzer (Bet He Beats Her)
Betty Humpser (Bet He Humps Her)
Bill Board (Billboard)
Bill Ding (Building)
Bill Leeake (Belly Ache)
Bill Lowney (Bologna) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami,
Sal Sage and Peppy
Roni
Bjorn Free (Born Free)
Bo Nessround (Bonus Round)
Bob Frapples (Bob for Apples)
Bowen Arrow (Bow and Arrow)
Boyd Schidt (Bird Shit)
Brice Tagg (Price Tag)
Brighton Early (Bright and Early)
Brook Lynn Bridge (Brooklyn Bridge)
Bud Weiser (Budweiser)
Burnedette Down (Burnt it Down)
Buster Cherry (Bust her Cherry)
Buster Hymen (Bust her Hymen)
Cal Culator (Calculator...duh)
Cal Efornia (California) - See "Neve Adda", "Elle Noise", "Louise E. Anna"
Cal Seeium (Calcium) - The name "Cal"
basically goes with any word starting with "cal"
Candice B. DePlace (Can This Be The Place)
Candice B. Fureal (Can This Be For Real)
Carl Arm (Car Alarm)
Carlotta Tendant (Car Lot Attendant)
Carra S. Midown (Caress Me Down)
Carrie DeKoffin (Carry the Coffin)
Carrie Oakey (Karaoke)
Carson O. Gin (Carcinogen)
Casey Deeya (Quesadilla)
Casey Needzit (In Case He Needs It)
Chad Terbocks (Chatterbox)
Chanda Lear (Chandalear)
Chi Spurger (Cheeseburger)
Chris Ko (Crisco)
Chris Mass (Christmas)
Chris P. Nugget (Crispy Nugget)
Chuck Mysak (Chuck My Sack)
Chuck Roast (Hmmm...Chuck Roast?)
Claire DeAir (Clear the Air)
Clara Nett (Clarinet)
Clara Sabell (Clear as a Bell)
Claude N. Skretchem (Clawed and Scratched Them)
Clint Toris (Clitoris)
Cody Pendant (Co-Dependant)
Cole Kutz (Cold cuts) See - Bill Lowney, Sal Ami,
Sal Sage and Peppy
Roni
Colette A. Day
Colin Allcars (Calling all Cars)
Colleen Cardd (Calling Card)
Connie Lingus (Cunnilingus)
Craig Potz (Crackpots)
Craven Moorehead (Craving More Head) -
Ok, so I finally put this one up!
Crystal Ball (Crystal Ball)
Curt N. Rodd (Curtain Rod)
Curt Zee (Curtsy)
Cy Burns (Sideburns)
Cy Kosis (Psychosis)
Dale E. Bread (Daily Bread)
Dan D. Lyon (Dandelion)
Dan Druff (Dandruff)
Dan Geruss (Dangerous)
Dan Gleebitz (Dangly Bits)
Danielle Soloud (Don't Yell So Loud)
Darius Lesgettham (There He Is, Let's Get Him)
Darrell B. Moore (There'll
be More)
Daryl Lect (Derelict)
Dawn Keebals (Donkey Balls)
Dee Capitated (Decapitated)
Dee Faced (Defaced)
Dee Sember (December)
Dennis Toffice (Dentist Office)
Denny Juan Heredatt (Did Anyone Hear That?) - Sent by my friend...Denny!
Des Buratto (Desperado)
Diane Toluvia (Dyin' to Love Ya)
Di O'Bolic (Diobolic)
Dick Cumoff (Dick Come Off) - A real name
in a phone book!
Dick Gozinia (Dick Goes In Ya)
Dick Head (Uhhh...Dick Head)
Dick N. Cider (Dick Inside Her)
Dick Zucker (Dick Sucker...You Know Who You Are)
Dick Tater (Dictator)
Didi Reelydoit (Did He Really Do It?)
Dinah Sore (Dinosaur)
Doll R. Bill...(Dollar Bill)
Don Thatt (Done That) See "Ben
Thair (Ben There)"
Doug Graves (Dug Graves)
Douglas S. Halfempty (The Glass is Half Empty)
Drew Blood (Drew Blood)
Drew Peacock (Droopy Cock)
Duane DeVane (Drain the Vain)
Dustin D. Furniture (Dusting the Furniture)
Dwayne Pipes (Drain Pipes)
Dylan Weed (Dealin' Weed)
Earl E. Byrd (Early Bird)
Ed Ible (Edible)
Ed Jewcation (Education)
Ed Venture (Adventure)
Eileen Dover (I Leaned Over)
Ella Vader (Elevator)
Elle O'Quent (Eloquent)
Ellie Noise (Illinois) - See "Cal Efornia", "Neve Vadda", "Louise E. Anna"
Ellis Dee (L.S.D)
Elmer Sklue (Elmer's Glue)
Emma Roids (Hemorrhoids)
Eric Shun (Erection)
Evan Lee Arps (Heavenly Harps)
Evans Gayte (Heavan's Gate)
Eve Hill (Evil)
Eve Ning (Evening)
Eve O'Lution (Evolution)
Ewan Whatarmy (You and What Army?)
Faye Kinnitt (Faking It)
Faye Slift (Face Lift)
Faye Tallity (Fatality)
Fletcher Bisceps (Flex Your Bisceps)
Frank Furter (Frankfurter)
Freida Convict (Free the Convict)
Frank N. Stein (Frankenstein)
Gabe Asher (Gay Basher)
Gabe Barr (Gay Bar)
Gene E. Yuss (Genius)
Gene Poole (Gene Pool)
Ginger Vitis (Gingervitis)
Gil T. Azell (Guilty as Hell)
Gladys Eeya (Glad to See Ya)
Gus Comzadia (Gas Comes Outta Ya)
Gus Tofwin (Gust of Wind)
Hal E. Luya (Hallelujah)
Hal Jalikakick (How'd ya like a kick)
Hammond Eggs (Ham and Eggs)
Hank E. Panky (Hanky Panky)
Harmon Ikka (Harmonica)
Harris Mint (Harassment)
Harrison Fire (Hair is on Fire)
Harry Balzac (Hairy Ball Sack)
Harry Weiner (Hairy Wiener)
Hayden Seek (Hide & Seek)
Haywood Jablowme (Hey, Would You Blow Me?)
Haywood Jashootmee (Hey Would You Shoot Me?)
Hein Noon (High Noon)
Helen Back (Hell and Back)
Helena Hanbaskett (Hell In A Hand Basket)
Henador Titzhoff (He Gnawed Her Tits Off) - A real
name in an Austin, TX phonebook
Herbie Hind (Her Behind)
Herb E. Side (Herbiside)
Herb Eaverstinks (Her Beaver Stinks)
Herbie Voor (Herbivore)
Holden Mcgroin (Holding My Groin)
Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn) - See "Mary
Ott (Marriot)" and "Moe Telsiks (Motel Six)"
Holly Wood (Hollywood)
Homan Provement (Home Improvent) And yes, I
do know a guy named Homan!
Homer Sexual (Homosexual)
Howard I. No (How Would I Know?)
Howe D. Pardner (Howdy Partner)
Hu Flung Pu (Who Flung Poo?)
Huang Annsaw (Wrong Answer)
Hugh Beeotch (You Bitch)
Hugh deMann (You Da Man!)
Hugh G. Rection (Huge Erection)
Hugh Jass (Huge Ass)
Hugh Mungous (Humungous)
Hugo First (You Go First)
Hy Gene (Hygiene)
- My music site. Check it out!
Ida Hoe (Idaho)
Ida Whana (I Don't Want to)
Igor Beaver (Eager Beaver)
Ilene Dover (I Leaned Over)
Ima B. Leever (I'm A Believer)
I.P. Freehly (I Pee Freely)
Ira Fuse (I Refuse)
I. Ron Stomach (Iron Stomach)
Ivana Humpalot (I Want to Hump A Lot) -
From Austin Powers!
Ivan Itchinanus (I Hate an Itching Anus)
Ivana Kutchukokoff (I Wanna Cut Your Cock Off)
Ivana Tinkle ( I Want to Tinkle)
Izzy Backyet (Is He Back Yet?)
Izzy Cumming (Is He Cumming)
Jack Dupp (Jacked Up)
Jack Koff (Jack Off)
Jack Meoff (Jack Me Off)
Jack Pot (Jackpot!)
Jacques Strap (Jock Strap)
Jan U. Wharry (January)
Jane Linkfence (Chainlink Fence)
Jaqueline Hyde (Jekyll and Hyde) - I saw
this on some kids show (Very nice)
Jawana Die (Do Ya Wanna Die?)
Jay Walker (Uhhh...Jay Walker)
Jeanette Akenja-Nearing (Genetic Engineering)
Jed I. Knight (Jedi Knight)
Jeff Healitt (Did Ya Feel It?)
Jenny Tull (Genital)
Jerry Atrics (Geriatrics)
Jim Nasium (Gymnasium)
Joanna Hand (D'ya Want a Hand?)
Joe Czarfunee (Jokes Are Funny)
Joe King (Joking)
Jose Frayed (Who's Afraid)
Juan De Hattatime(One Day at a Time)
Juan Fortharoad (One For the Road)
Juan Nightstand (One Night Stant)
Juana Bea (Wanna-Be)
Justin Case (Just in Case)
Justin Credible (Just Incredible)
Kareem O'Wheat (Cream of Wheat)
Kaye Ken Coffee (Cake and Coffee)
Kay Neine (Canine)
Kay O'Pectate (Kaopectate)
Ken Opener (Can Opener)
Kenitra Bush (Can I Eat Your Bush)
Kenny Dewitt (Can He Do It?)
Kenny Fakur (Can he Fuck her) -
Naughty, naughty, naughty...
Kent Cook (Can't Cook)
Kim Payne Slogan (Campaign Slogan)
Kimmy Head (Give Me Head)
Lance Lyde (Landslide)
Laura Lynn Hardy (Laurel and Hardy)
Lee Keyrear (Leaky Rear)
Lee Nover (Lean Over)
Len DeHand (Lend a Hand)
Leo Tarred (Leotard)
Lily Livard (Lily Livered)
Lisa Neucar (Lease a New Car)
Liz Onnia (Lasagna)
Lou Briccant (Lubricant)
Lon Moore (Lawn Mower)
Luke Adam Go (Look at Him Go)
Lou Sirr (Loser)
Lou Stooth (Loose Tooth)
Louise E. Anna (Louisiana) - See "Cal Efornia", "Neve Vadda" "Elle Noise"
Lowden Clear (Loud and Clear)
Luke Atmyass (Look At My Ass)
Luna Tick (Lunatic)
Lyle Ike Adogg (Lie Like a Dog)
Lynn Guini (Linguini)
Lynn Meabuck (Lend Me a Buck)
Mabel Syrup (Maple Syrup)
Madame Crotch (My Damn Crotch)
Madka Owdiseez (Mad Cow Disease)
Manuel Labor (Manual labor) - This one
is from a crank call, found HERE
Marcus Absent (Mark Us Absent)
Marge Innastraightline (March in a Straight Line)
Marion Money (Marrying Money)
Mark Mywords (Mark My Words)
Mark Z. Spot (Mark The Spot)
Marsha Dimes (March of Dimes)
Martha Fokker (Motherfucker)
Mary Christmas (Merry Christmas)
Mary Gold (Marigold)
Mary Juana (Marijuana)
Mary Ott (Marriot) - See "Holly
Dayin (Holiday Inn)" and "Moe Telsiks"
Mary Thonn (Marathon)
Master Bates (Masturbates)
May I. Tutchem (May I Touch Them?)
May O'Nays (Mayonaise)
Max E. Mumm (Maximum)
Max E. Pad (Maxi Pad)
Megan Bacon (Makin' Bacon)
Mel Keetehts (Milky Tits)
Melissa Tothis (Ma, Listen to This)
Mel Practiss (Malpractice)
Michael Toris (My Clitoris)
Michelle Lynn (Michelin)
Midas Well (Might As Well...)
Mike Hunt (My Cunt) -
I couldn't resist putting this up...
Mike Ockhurts (My Cock Hurts)
Mike Ocksmall (My Cock's Small)
Mike Rohsopht (Microsoft)
Mike Rotchburns (My Crotch Burns) -
Another one in this "Obscene Series"
Milly Meter (Millimeter)
Minnie Skurt (Miniskirt)
Miss Alanius (Miscellaneous)
Misty Meanor (Misdemeanor)
Mitch Again (Michigan)
Miya Buttreaks (My Butt Reaks)
Moe DeLawn (Moe the Lawn)
Moe Lester (Molester)
Moe Skeeto (Mosquito)
Moe Telsiks (Motel Six) - See "Holly
Dayin (Holiday Inn)" and "Mary Ott (Marriot)"
Mort Tallity (Mortality)
Myra Maines (My Remains)
Mysha Long (My Shlong)
Nadia Seymour (Now do you see more?)
Nida Lyte (Need a Light)
Neil B. Formy (Kneel Before Me)
Neve Adda (Nevada) - See "Cal
Efornia", "Elle Noise",
"Louise E. Anna"
Nick L. Andime (Nickel and Dime)
Nick O'Teen (Nicotine)
Nick Ovtime (Nick Of Time)
Oliver Closeoff (All of her Clothes Off)
Ophelia Titzoff (I'll Feel Your Tits Off)
Opie Umsgood (Opium's Good)
Otto B. Kilt (Ought to be Killed)
Otto Whackew (Ought to Whack You)
Paige Turner (Page Turner)
Papa Boner (Pop a Boner)
Pat Myckok (Pat My Cock)
Patty Meltt (Umm....Patty Melt)
Patty O'Furniture (Patio Furniture)
Pearl E. Gates(Pearly Gates)
Pearl E White (Pearly White)
Peppy Roni (Pepperoni) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami,
Sal Sage, and
Bill Lowney
Pete Zaria (Pizzeria)
Peter Pantz (Peed her pants)
Phil A. Delphia (Philadelphia)
Phil Atio (Fellatio)
Phil DeGrave (Fill the grave)
Phil Down (Feel Down)
Phil McCracken (Fill My Crack In)
Phil Myez (Feel My Ass)
Phil Mypockets (Fill my pockets)
Phillip McCrevice (Fill up my Crevice)
Phyllis Schlong (Feel his Shlong)
Polly Esther Pantts (Polyester Slacks)
Poppa Woody (Pop A Woody)
Pussy Galore (Well...What the hell do you think it means?!)
Quimby Ingmeen (Quit Being Mean)
Quint S. Henschel (Quintessential)
Quinton Chingme (Quit Touching Me)
Quinton Plates (Contemplates) - Only thing I could
think of...
Rachel DeScrimination (Racial Descrimination)
Ram Dass (Rammed Ass) - This is the actual
name of an author of a story I read!
Ray N. Carnation (Reincarnation)
Ray Pugh (Rape You)
Renee Sance (Renaisance)
Richard Cranium (Well...another name for "Dick Head")
Rick Kleiner (Recliner)
Rick O'Shea (Ricochet)
Rip Tile (Reptile)
Rita Book (Read a Book)
Robin D.Craydle (Robbing the Cradle)
Robin Banks (Robbing Banks)
Robin Meeblind (Robbing Me Blind)
Ron A. Muck (Run Amuck)
Ruben Mycock (Rubbing My Cock) - Feel
free to substitute My(Insert Anything Here)
Russell Ingleaves (Rustling Leaves)
Sadie Word (Say the Word)
Sal Ami (Salami) See - Cole Kutz, Bill Lowney, Sal Sage and Peppy
Roni
Sal Sage (Sausage) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami, Bill
Lowney and Peppy
Roni
Sal T. Penuz (Salty Penis or Peanuts)
Sam Manilla (Salmonella)
Sam Pull (Sample)
Sam Dayoulpay (Some day you'll pay)
Sam Urai (Samurai)
Samson Night (Samsonite)
Sarah Doctorinthehouse (Is There a Doctor in the House) -
Old Knock Knock joke!
Scott Shawn DeRocks (Scotch on the Rocks)
Seaman Sample (Semen Sample) - In the Navy.....
Seymour Butts (See more butts)
Sheeza Freak (She's a Freak)
Sheri Cola (Cherry Cola)
Sherman Wadd Evver (Sure Man, Whatever)
Shirley Knot (Surely not?)
Shirley U. Jest (Surely You Jest)
Sid Down (Sit Down)
Sir Fin Waves (Surfin' Waves)
Stacey Rhect (Stays Erect)
Stan Dup (Stand up)
Stu Padasso (Stupid Asshole)
Stu Pitt (Stupid)
Sue Case (Suitcase)
Sue E. Side (Suicide)
Sue Permann (Superman)
Sue Shi (Sushi) - One of my personal favorites...From
The CranKings
Sue Ridge (Sewage)
Sue Yourazzof (Sue Your Ass Off)
Tanya Hyde (Tan Your Hide)
Tara Newhall (Tear a New Hole)
Tate Urchips (Tater Chips)
Ted E. Baer (Teddy Bear)
Telly Vision (Television)
Teresa Green (Trees are Green)
Tess Tickle (Testicle)
Tim Burr (Timber)
Tina See (Tennessee)
Titus Balsac (Tightest Ball Sack)
Torah Hyman (Tore a Hymen)
Ty Tannick (Titanic)
Ty Tass (Tight Ass)
Tyrone Shoes (Tie Your Own Shoes)
Ulee Daway (You Lead the Way)
U.P. Freehly (You Pee Freely)
Val Crow (Velcro)
Val Lay (Valet)
Val Veeta (Velveeta)
Vlad Tire (Flat Tire)
Walter Melon (Watermelon)
Warren Piece (War and Peace)
Wayne Deer (Reindeer)
Wayne Kerr (Wanker)
Willie Maykit (Will He Make It?)
Wilma Leggrowbach (Will My Leg Grow Back?)
Winnie Bago (Winnebago)
Winnie Dipoo (Winnie the Pooh)
Woody U. No (What Do You Know?)
Xavier Breath (Save Your Breath)
Xavier Money (Save Your Money)
Ummm.....Just Click HERE
Yerma Wildo (Your Mom Will Do) - My
friend snuck this in to a math problem at school!
Yousuckmynuts N. Scratchm (You Suck My Nuts and Scratch Them) - Ummm.......
Yule B. Sari (You'll Be Sorry)
Zeke N. Yeshallfind (Seek and You Shall Find)
Zelda Kowz (Sell the Cows)
Zoltan Pepper (Salt and Pepper)
- The
home of the greatest songs ever written....Well, maybe not exactly. But if you've
ever wondered what you get out of the minds of two teenage musical...geniouses...then
this is the place to go. An eclectic blend melodic trauma, straight from the
heart to you......Ok, I'll admit it, these songs are mostly about monkey's and
hair gel!
- This is my other site. This page was
originally a part of this site. So check out this page. Lots of stuff for you
to see...
- This site is great! There are tons of crazy postcards to
look at. From all eras and all places. Go ahead and take a look, you'll laugh
your ass off.
- This page is cool. It gives the real names of various musicians.
Get what I'm saying? Either way, check it out. You're bound to love it, baby!
Archive of Punny Names - Similar to this page, only different. The names are divided up into different last names...Umm...just check it out for yourselves
Ridiculous Names - Another page of interesting names with double-meanings. Some of them are not on this page, so check it out!
John Beschler's Homepage - This guy has some great links on his page (Including mine!)...
Page first constructed and released on 11/7/97