"Laughter is Good for the Soul"

Jesus Loves You!

When I was in my younger days, I weighed a few pounds less, I needn't hold my tummy in To wear a belted dress.

But now that I am older, I've set my body free; There's comfort of elastic Where once my waist would be.

Inventor of those high-heeled shoes, My feet have not forgiven; I have to wear a nine now, But used to wear a seven.

And how about those pantyhose- They're sized by weight, you see, So how come when I put them on, The crotch is at my knees?

Though my hair has turned to silver and my skin no longer fits, On the inside, I'm the same old me, Just the outside's changed a bit.

So far today I've done all right. I haven't Gossiped. I haven't Lost my Temper. I haven't been Greedy, Grumpy, Nasty, Selfish, or Over Indulgent. I'm Very Thankful for that. But in a Few more Minutes God I'm Going to get out of bed, And then I'll Probably Need a Lot More Help!

New things you learn when you have children~

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however,  to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.

When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh,"

it's already too late.

Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes

it does not leak - it explodes. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.

No matter how much Jello you put in a bath tub you still can't walk on water.

The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy. It will however make cats dizzy. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

"Here Kitty Kitty"

Whoever said the Creator doesn't have a sense of humor? Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church. He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and was then afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc. The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car he could bend the tree down enough to get the kitten. He did all this, checking his progress frequently. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went "boing!" and the kitten instantly sailed through the air-out of sight. The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten. So he prayed, "Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping," and went on about his business. A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He was amazed to see she was buying cat food. Now this woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, "Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?" She replied, "You won't believe this," and told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, "Well if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it." She told the pastor, "I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes.

A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her."

Never underestimate the Power of God!

A Fun Page of Mine...Sue

Fun & Games, Show Applets, Stories, Humor,

Jukebox Gospel, etc

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Page edited 6/11/01

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