At our last meeting, people suggested some topics for future meetings. They were:
Labels, Polys and Fiction, Coming Out, Jealousy, Financial Handling, Symmetry vs. Asymmetry (Romantic/Non-romantic), How to run poly relationships (hierarchical/non-hierarchical), Nitty Gritty Living Together Stuff, Misconceptions About Polyamory.
“Labels” is a good place to start. How can you talk about polyamory if you can’t agree on what to call anything, or what anything means? Do people even agree on what polyamory is?
When I began reading my poly novel at our open mike in San Jose, a poly friend asked me whether people would know what I was talking about. I said the polys would probably understand, and the non-polys wouldn’t. What specifically did this relate to? In Chapter 1, one poly asks another, “Is Jade poly?” Pretty straight-forward; but “polyamory” is not in the wider world’s vocabulary, so non-polys probably wouldn’t understand. So how to get the idea across without presenting a lecture on polyamory?
“Depends what you mean by poly. Some people will tell you that polyamory is simply honest and open non-monogamy. But that can just mean a lot of sex partners. But I think polyamory is about love: Honest, open, deep adult love. When possible, commitment. Jade’s definitely attracted to other people...”
So…is she or isn’t she?
Let’s try to focus on “labels” at out next discussion!